Fading Shadow
by Outta-Ak'sHead
Summary: Set during Eclipse. What happens when the one who helped you up, returns as the one you were made to hate? What if he has a reason to hang around you, like a shadow, like a guardian. What might come out of this?
1. Chapter 1

**Compromise **

_Life._

Hmm…what is life? Clearly something that I can't have or never will have. I can't have it, because I deserved to be punished. For what? I have no idea. All I know is that I am punished. A life sentence (ironic, isn't it?). Something that was once rightfully mine was taken 'away' from me because of…fate.

_Fate._

My fucking fate. A so-called path chosen for me that I have absolute control of. You'd think it would be crazy but it's not. It's never fucking wrong; it's always right. Always fucking right! Stupid, stupid fate! You probably don't get what my problem is. Well, I'll break it down to you. When I was young, I would love to read fairytales and would always describe my life as a fairytale.

I was once a princess, who had a happy life with her supportive family and the love of her life.

The love of my life was taken away by my cousin, who happened to visit the kingdom just when my love declared his love for me. But of course that all came crashing down when he fell for her. It was like 'love at first sight' or whatever.

Broken hearted and alone, filled with so much anger and pain, the princess transforms into a huge monster (a dog or wolf, if you will) along with fellow brother, which causes the king to have a heart attack and die. In other words, the king was killed by just the sight of his daughter.

Now, the princess is bitter, bitchy and resentful that she is no longer claimed as a princess and is forced to work for the dogs (no pun intended), but only to find out to be working under, ex love of her life.

There you go. I'm a total Greek tragedy, ain't I? Except I don't die in the end. But who knows? It can easily be changed… if I had a choice.

I guess that's when I stopped believing in fairytales or love. Apparently in werewolf dictionary, the word 'love' is replaced with the word 'imprinting' which has given it a whole new meaning and ultimate hatred from me. Imprinting is supposed to be everything to us; it's magical. Ugh, give me a break. Only if I was warned before or someone whispered to me, "Hey, your Sam will fall for your cousin because of some wolf magic and leave you all alone. Then you'll turn into a giant menopausal dog, which in the process will kill your father." I think things would have been a lot better if life was this easy. Who said it ever was easy…or ever fair? Well not for me, at least.

"Leah! Leah!" a booming voice came from behind my door, along with loud thumping of my door. What did he want? Does he not know about my privacy? Does he want to die? The door looked like it would fall off its hinges, if he didn't stop already.

"What is it, dork?" I yelled out at the door as I rolled over onto my stomach, and narrowed my eyes at the door when my annoying baby brother (well, very large and big looking baby brother) pushed open the door and skipped in. I know we're family and shit but man, he sometimes is too optimistic for his own good (it's annoying and really gets on your nerves, at times).

"Hey, come on. We have to go" Seth announced, ruffling his now short hair and bouncing on his feet, like he had to go to the bathroom. You see what I mean, when I said too happy for his own good? It's creepy.

"What do you mean by 'we'? I don't take orders from a 16 year old" I shot back at him and slowly pulled myself to a sitting position. I know it was a long shot, but I didn't care. I do not take orders from anyone. _No one_.

"We need to go. Today is the meeting with the Cullens, remember?" Seth said, crossing his arms across his chest. That name. _Those_ people. I felt my hands grip tightly on my bed covers. I hated them. I didn't need to know them or meet them to hate them; I think I had well enough reason. It was just disgusting even fraternizing with those…those things. The sole reason why everything in my life came crashing down. I felt a shiver run up my spine, as my breathing started to come out in hard and raspy breaths.

"Why…should I care about the Cullens?" I spat out of spite. I brought my eyes up to my brother, who suddenly tensed up as well.

"Leah, don't do this now. You know we have to meet them. It's for Bella's sake…for Jake's" Seth explained, planting his hands inside his pockets. Bella. Another reason to hate my life. I don't even care, let alone like Bella Swan. She's the reason why the leeches are still here. I don't even know what she or for the fact they saw in each other. Forbidden Love, my ass. And to top it off, Jacob Black fell for the leech lover. He is such a sucker for love and a total idiot. He wouldn't let her go at any cost because he loves her. Oh my god. That boy was born, brain damaged. And he was supposed to be the rightful alpha of the La Push pack? Psh, he's a pathetic excuse for an alpha; as well as Sam.

"I am not going to be a pathetic guard dog for those bloodsuckers" I snarled at my brother. I will not fight for these things that I wanted to see die. This is ruining the reason we exist (Thank Jacob for that).

"Leah, I know it's weird but we have to do this. It's our duty" Seth replied.

"Our duty?" I snorted and rose to my feet. "You're kidding me right? Our duty is not to risk our lives for those things that are already dead within. Our duty is not to put our lives on the line for those things that are the main purpose for our transformation. And our duty is not to sacrifice everything for those things who we don't even give a shit about!"

"Leah, for once in your life think about others, other than yourself! They are in as much danger as we are" Seth said with annoyance. Of course, they are in danger since the Bella chick is the one that brought it on. And guess who got us into this suck fest? Yes, Jacob Black (that dipshit).

"I don't think that Cullens are claimed as people" I huffed, crossing my arms across my chest and gazing outside the window, into the dark sky.

"God Leah! Do we have to go everyday like this? I mean, come on! What happened to you, Lee? We argue more than we used to. This is crazy" Seth grumbled, holding his head in frustration. I felt my jaw tighten as I moved my angered eyes back at him.

"Everything happened…everything" I hissed, between my teeth. I saw Seth's face soften as he dropped his hands drop down and sighed. He knew what I meant. He was there when it all happened. He knew it very well, and yet he asked me.

"Leah please…look past it. These people need our help right now. Do this for Jacob at least" Seth sighed, crossing it across his chest. How can I look past this when it stares at me, right in the face? How can I look past it when I have to keep seeing and keep being reminded of it?

"Why would I do this Jacob? I couldn't care less about him than I do for Bella" I snorted, planting my hands on my hips.

"You used to be friends, you know" Seth stated.

"Well, that was a long time ago and things have changed…don't you think?" I spoke. I really didn't care, or wonder about Jacob and why should I? Sure, when we were young, we used to hang out but that was before I lost everything and he was on cloud nine over that leech lover.

"Come on Leah, don't make it as hard as it is" Seth groaned, dropping his hands in annoyance.

"I'm not. I'm making it easier. I don't want to do any shit involving these leeches" I snarled, feeling the hatred towards them surge through me again.

"Well you have to come. Sam ordered that we all should be involved and that it would advantage us" Seth explained, looking at the ground at the mention of Sam's name. 'Sam ordered'. That's all I've being hearing since I joined this wolf pack. Being ordered, being controlled, being forced to work underneath the one you loved and hated the most and who caused you, nothing but pain.

"Advantage us? How so?" I questioned.

"Well according to Jacob, one of the Cullens seems to know of a strategy that would help us defeat the new-borns since he has done it before" Seth uttered. Killing their own kind? Pure monsters, they are. But who can blame them? They were meant to die; the reason for our existence.

"Well I bet you guys won't need me. Thanks but no thanks. I'm not getting into this death sentence. Go tell Sam, I'm out" I huffed, slumping down onto the bed again. I prefer to work solo. Being alone and abandoned, has that effect on you and I've got used to it. I'm the only one who cares about me and I'm my own boss. Just when Seth was about to open his gob, a loud and deep howl emerging from the depths of the forest, piercing through the small openings of my window. Seth and I gazed at the forest, knowing exactly who it was. I felt my annoyance return as well as a small tinge of pain, run through my veins.

"I'm guessing that's a no" Seth sighed and gazed at me again. I moved my gaze to the floor this time, and clenched my fists as well as my jaw. I had to go and I couldn't stop myself. That was the alpha calling, the alpha command that no one could disobey. See what I mean by working with the dogs? It really is the pits. The fact that you're merely a puppet being dangled by your ancestors and their morals to protect their land from the 'cold ones'. And here we are today, actually helping the 'cold ones' just to protect a mere mortal. Great.

I let out a frustrated growl before pulling myself off the bed and glaring at the brother. He looked at me with sympathetic eyes before leaving my room, gesturing me to follow. I dragged my feet after my brother, getting ready to face those things. I don't even know why me and my brother even got involved in this? Oh right. Cause we had no other choice. This is the fate that our "amazing" ancestors picked for us. My life was already screwed up so I guess it was no surprise (well for me, at least) but why Seth? Why my baby brother?

I mean, I look like I hate him and don't care shit for him but the truth is that, I fear for his security. I mean, he's so young and he had a whole life ahead of him. Me, I lost all of that long before it was possible. But for him, he thinks it's the best thing that ever happened to him. He has no idea, does he?

"Come on Leah. We have to phase" Seth announced. I then realized that we were in a small forest clearing that was covered with over grown trees which almost covered the black sky.

"Am I going to let you see me undress and phase?" I shot at him. I know it was a cheap shot, but I was just so pissed at everything right now (I had a reason). Seth made a disgusted face before sighing and walking off in the other direction and into the bushes. I let out a frustrated sigh before slipping off my shorts and shirt. You have no idea how this felt like. To be the only woman to undress in public and turn into a giant dog. I had to go commando since Sam said it was fast. I mean what the fuck? I ran my hands through my hair, ticked off. Oh yeah, he even forced me to cut my hair, claiming it was best. My hair which was till my shoulders was now a bob. Like I said, controlled by the alpha command.

I took in a deep breath and let it out, before feeling that familiar shiver run up my spine again. It got stronger and stronger, till my body started to physically shake, quite violently. In about a minute, I felt myself explode almost out of my skin and into fur, letting out a small snarl as I came on to all fours. I shook my grey fur, before hearing another ripping sound from the bushes. This is how I lived now these days, if you call it living. This is my fuck-up "life". And here I was now, going to see the leeches that are the reason for my being.

_Looks like the bitter harpy has joined in_ his voice snorted in my head. See how my life is so tragic? To live in the mind of these jackasses and hear their every thought, intention, secret and other shit.

_Shut the fuck up, Black_ I snarled, as I started to follow their scent. I dragged my paws, digging them deeper into the earth as I started to get the view of another small clearing. I saw that russet wolf emerge in front of me, just as annoyed as I was. Why is he annoyed? He's not the one who is forced to protect a leech lover.

_No, but just seeing you, can totally ruin anyone's day_ he huffed, rolling his overly large wolf eyes at me.

_Good, at least you know how I feel when I see your face_ I shot back, stomping my paw on the earth. We both threw each other irritated snarls before another thought interrupted.

_Jacob, Leah, both of you stop. We have to go now_ his alpha voice rang in both of our heads. We both shot each other a glare before running towards our 'alpha and pack'. This is who I am, people. And this is the real jest of my life and how every day I wished I was dead. This is who I've become.

I'm Leah Clearwater; the bitch, the bitter harpy and this is the animal I've become, which will live with me, forever.

_Forever._

* * *

**Here you go you guys. My new short Fanfiction, 'Fading Shadow' (I shall explain the title in the next chapter). This is set during Eclipse just before, the pack meet the Cullens for Jasper's new-born fighting lesson.**

**This is my Leah/Edward Fanfiction which I decided to write since someone suggested to continue '**_**Heart Of My Guardian Angel'**_** because she thought that a Leah and Edward Fanfiction is really interesting and different. It really is so I decided to give it a shot. Edward is not yet introduced (duh) but he will and you'll see what I have in mind for these two. This chapter was suppose to be longer but I decided to shorten it, as an introduction and the next chapter would be when you see Leah's views on the wolves, her feelings for Sam, her rivalry with Jacob, and when she meets the Cullens.**

**I hope you liked this chapter and remember that this was during her bitter state so he detests the pack, rivals with Jacob, teases Seth but cares for him; hate loves Sam and absolutely hates leeches. The next chapter will be out in a while and I'm taking a small break from MD (just a reminder). So I hope you look forward for the rest of this story.**

**Reviews are just amazing and I'll love you for it =D**


	2. Chapter 2

**The Beginning of the End**

My life officially sucks. It sucked before, but now it officially sucks. I mean not only am I going to help bloodsuckers protect that stupid Swan girl, but the Black dimwit walking next to me wouldn't stop mumbling shit about her. God, it's so agitating. I mean he is literally screaming in my head on how much he loves her, how he's going to protect her, and how he knows that she loves him back. I mean come on kid! Strap on a pair!

_At least I care for others_ he finally broke out from his worries and narrowing his eyes at me.

_Is that supposed to be an insult?_ I shot back, narrowing my eyes back at him. He let out a small puff before looking ahead, cussing in his head how he ever got stuck with me and why I had to comment on everything he thought.

_That is because you are pathetic. I mean come on, Jacob. Have seen the girl? I mean physically. I don't even think she hit puberty. She has no substances. Seriously, when you look at her, just cut her hair off and voila, it's a boy_ I snorted, and showing a bit of my wolf teeth. I have met Bella Swan before. I think we were at Jacob's house for a barbeque (don't ask why I was there), and she had come. I swear, it felt like the first time I met her, I knew I hated her. That's when Jacob let out a small growl before I saw his enormous head heading towards me. As quick as I was, I dodged it and jumped in front of him, baring my teeth. This is what every day with Jacob, went like for me. We both were now engaged in a glaring contest.

_Shut the fuck up, Leah. You're such a bitch_ Jacob growled, standing straight so that he looked larger. The pack was huge but Jacob and Sam were the biggest. I, on the other hand was the smallest. I think it's a sexist thing. But his size didn't intimidate me. After all, I was the fastest in the pack.

_I think I know that_ I sneered, again revealing a bit of my wolf teeth. It was so easy to agitate Jacob, especially if you were me. He's a like child. He'll get hyped up on the smallest things and he would never ever admit to anything. He has his own "ethics". Just as we were about to engage into a huge 'snarling' contest this time, our minds were distracted with images of…us? It was when we were young (I was ten and Jacob was eight) and we were throwing mud balls at these guys who had pulled Rebecca's ponytail. As the guys ran away, we both laughed and gave each other high-fives. I shook my head, violently to remove these repulsive images.

_Seth, what the hell?_ I yelled at the sandy-brown wolf coming out of the bushes next to us. Jacob finally woke up from those images, and shook his head too. What the hell is my brother up to?

_Just happy memories_ Seth softly confessed, walking towards us and kind of biting his large wolf lip. Happy…memories? How were they happy?

_My thoughts exactly_ Jacob commented, looking at me. We both haven't hung out in ages and frankly, I didn't care. I mean, I'm not going to hang out with this leech-lover-loving idiot. After all, he's the fucking reason we're here. Seth let out a sigh and dropped his head down to the forest floor. Why is he acting all like this? He knows how much I hate Jacob and how much Jacob hates me. Why does he keep trying doing this shit then?

_I'm just trying to help, Lee_ Seth sighed which made me and Jacob snort at the same time. Help? This is hundred percent no help whatsoever. Just when I, and from the looks of it Jacob too, were about to comment on that remark…guess who decides to butt in?

_All three of you, quit it and come join us_ Sam's alpha voice boomed in our heads.

_Yeah, we wouldn't want to kill the leeches without you guys_ Jared said and it sounded like he was already there with Sam. God, and to think that I actually used to hang out with him. He's like Sam's bitch.

_Hey, I heard that_ Jared answered.

_You were meant to_ I said rolling my eyes. Weren't these boys just so 'smart'?

_No one kills the leeches. Not yet at least_ Jacob announced, turning to the trees and heading towards Sam. Seth followed, skipping behind him. Oh my god, my brother is unbelievable. I shook my head, slowly before dragging my paws again after them.

_Aw Jake, you're no fun_ Paul huffed. This guy over here is the number one jackass in our pack. Seriously, he didn't have to turn into a wolf to become one. He always was; always trying to act cool and think he was god's gift to women.

_You should really learn to shut up, Leah_ Paul snarled, and I could actually feel his pulse run through me (Crazy, I know). Not to mention this guy has temperamental issues too.

_You're the one to talk, Paul_ I snorted, finally getting a view of the mixed colored furs behind the tree branches. Seth, Jacob and I were finally accompanied by seven wolves. This is "our" pack and I was the sole girl, or the sole bitch you could say.

_You got that right_ Quil snorted. Oh great, him again. This guy just recently joined the pack and he already acts like he owns it. He has such a thick head and oh, did I mention that he's a pedophile? Oh yeah, he imprinted on a two year old. How disgusting is that?

_Shut up, Leah. You know I don't see Claire that way_ Quil argued, and you could almost see him pouting. God, he is such a baby. And guess whose Claire's aunt? That's right. My darling cousin, Emily. Oh, how much I loathe her. And you're thinking I shouldn't hate her cause she's family. Well, she isn't to me anymore.

_Quit groveling Leah and pretending that you have feelings_ Jacob's voice cut through all my thoughts. How dare he say that? That fucking bastard. I let out a warning growl before running towards Jacob and head butting his gut. I thought I got him, but the next thing I knew I was thrown towards a close by tree, hitting the trunk pretty hard before landing slowly on the ground. I may be the fastest, but fucking Jacob Black was the strongest. I let out a small whimper and looked up to see a black wolf standing between me and a smirking wolf Jacob.

_That's it! Jacob, don't lay one paw on her and Leah, don't annoy anyone right now_ Sam said, moving his gaze from me to Jacob and back to me.

_Too late for that_ Paul said, rolling his eyes. I pulled myself off the ground and gave a death glare at Jacob. He is definitely on my list now.

_Look, not all of us are happy with this okay? But we have to do this. For our tribe and our land_ Sam lectured. Oh god, his speeches are getting so old. All he cares about now is her duty, the pack, the land and most importantly….his Emily.

_Now come on, we are supposed to meet them at the open clearing_ Sam announced, before walking away from me and into the trees. Paul, Jared and the other two cubs followed their alpha whereas Quil and Embry watched me and Jacob as if they were eagerly waiting for a fight to break out.

_I don't have time for you, Clearwater. I have someone to save_ Jacob snarled, before storming into the trees. Embry and Quil exchanged glances before following their darling Jacob. Someone to save? He had someone to save, who isn't even his. Man, that boy's so screwed. I saw Seth walk towards me as I shook my fur.

_Leah, you need to control yourself. Could you please behave when we meet the Cullens? I've met Doctor Cullen before and he's a good guy. Please behave_ Seth pleaded. I just narrowed my eyes at my brother. Now he was ordering me? I was brought to this level, where nothing seemed to work with me.

_If you're telling me to suck up to the leeches, you're telling me to be someone I'm not_ I shot back at my brother, before pushing past his shoulder and walking through the trees. Like I said before, my life officially sucked and it can't get any worse than this.

Seth and I were finally able to catch up with the rest, as we entered into this huge open clearing. Now the dark sky was in full view and there was a huge blanket of grass laid in front of us. I brought my huge head up to the sky and gazed at the sky smeared black and blue, with small stars shimmering from a distance. It wasn't a perfect night but it was indeed a beautiful one. Just once, I wanted to put everything behind and just relax as everything passes by, washing away my worries and regret. Ha, yeah right would that ever happen. I closed my eyes, taking in a huge breath and just when I was about to let it out slowly, therefore relaxing my body, I was bombarded by worries, anger, suspicions and visions. And they weren't my own. No, they were images of….Claire playing in the mud? What the fuck? I looked around to see the dogs, with tense yet worrisome faces on. More images flash in my head. Of Claire, Kim, Bella and guess who again? My cousin Emily, of course. That's all Sam ever cares about anymore. I shall repeat again: His duty to the pack, his land, his tribe…and his Emily. I kept banging my head, thinking how stupid I was for letting this happen. I mean, I was fine before and now, I'm pitied for being Sam's lousy ex. God. The next image was unexpected actually. Why do I have pictures of Embry's mom running in my head?

_Seriously Embry? Your mom? You sick pervert_ I snorted, turning my large pupils at the dark grey wolf. Hey, who said I would stop with my comments. Plus, we were about to see leeches so I'm pissed and need entertainment.

_What?_ Embry innocently asked. God, he was so naïve and innocent. And he hangs out with Jacob and Quil? Psh. Might as well, have some fun with it.

_Well, I can't fully blame you for missing your mommy. I mean, she's all you have_ I stated, shrugging my shoulders. Embry bowed down his head and I saw Sam and Jacob narrow their eyes at me, wondering what the heck I was getting at. I mean, even though we could hear each other, I'd become pretty good at keeping certain thoughts and intentions to myself.

_It's good; I mean it's better than missing your dad. Oh wait, you don't exactly know who your dad is, do you? I mean with the whole 'affair' thing your mom went through. I got to say, that woman knows how to make her way around the pack_ I huffed, looking away from the wary stares that pack was giving me. I felt Embry's guilt and sadness go through his thoughts and I got warning energies from everyone else.

_What? I was just wondering. I mean, for all we know he could be Sam's, Quil's or Jacob's half-brother_ I said finally looking at the pack again. Don't the others think about Embry possibly being their brother? I mean, it's kind of weird having a half brother. As bad as having a brother named Embry. Embry? Seriously, what does that mean? Is that even a name?

_Keep your opinions to yourself, Leah_ Quil finally backed up Embry. Oh, backing up his little lover? How revolting. I rolled my eyes and just when me and Quil were about to get into some seriously arguing, we were again interrupted by Seth.

_Hey guys, they're here_ he announcing, pointing his snout straight ahead. Everyone's gaze went to the white figure walking towards us, cautiously. A snarl escaped from my teeth, as I got a good view of the leech. Yeah, he better be careful or a certain grey werewolf might rip him from limb to limb. He was incredibly pale, with dark blonde short locks and sparkling topaz eyes. It was freaky and I couldn't help a small shiver crawl up my spine. That's when I noticed that he wasn't alone. No, he had his whole clan with him. There were about five of them about ten feet away from this one. They had the same skin color and eye color but two were blond (guessing were twins), one with brown long locks and the other two with short black hair. I could smell them from across the field and it wasn't pleasant, at all. Man, this is even more scary and disgusting that I thought it would be.

"Welcome" he finally greeted when there was a safe distance between him and us. His voice was so cold and striking; it made my fur stand on my back.

_That's Doctor Carlisle Cullen_ Seth explained. He's a doctor? Bet, a lot of patients died just by looking at him rather than him drinking them dry. I mean seriously, he looked out of this world.

_Everyone fall back and phase. It'll be easy to communicate with them_ Jacob suggested. Wait what? Did he say phase…in front of the leeches?

_What? No way in hell, I'm going to phase in front of these leeches. I'd rather keep my fur on than go and be nice to these lifeless bloodsuckers_ I thought angrily, the blood rushing to my head, as the others headed back to the bushes. I heard small mumbles and snarls from the bushes but I ignored it. There is no way I'll let my guard down in front of these things.

_Leah, phase back now_ Sam tried to order me, in a stern tone but failed. How dare he use the command to make me phase so we can fraternize with the leeches? I didn't know that Sam could sink this low. That bastard!

_Don't use that tone with me, Sam Uley_ I snarled, showing my teeth at him. He may be alpha but he can't control everything that is mine. He already took away and destroyed everything that I gave him…but not anymore.

_Fine_ Sam sighed in defeat. _The others phase back_.

_Man, and I thought it would be cool to have a chick around _Jared huffed. Well, that's me guys so deal with it. P.S: I'm not a chick, I'm a bitch. I turned my gaze away from the pack and leeches as I heard the pack phase to their human forms and come out of the bushes, in their regular cut-offs and walked to the doctor leech. I moved back to the where the forest met the clearing, keeping my distance from any of this trauma. Sam of course, stood at the head of the pack while Jacob stood close by as his 'lawful' beta, looking around for something. Probably for his pathetic girlfriend who didn't happen to be here. What happened? Did the big bad wolves scare her?

"Thank you for calling us here. We will watch and listen, but no more. This is most we can ask of our self control" Sam spoke, in a very alpha like and mature tone (he wanted to prove he's superior, no shit). By our, he meant me, of course. Maybe a bit Paul as well. But can you blame me? These leeches are the fucking reason I'm in this shit.

"This is more than enough. My son Jasper…" doctor leech gestured to the blond leech, who got all tense suddenly. Ha, wuss. "..has experience in this area. He will teach us how they fight, how they are to be deafened. I'm sure you can apply this to your own hunting style."

"They are different from you?" Sam questioned, curiously. What? There are different types of leeches? Oh great, bring more misery to my life. Bring more pain, more frustration, just bring everything; pour it down my empty chest. Seriously, this Bella chick is going to wish she wasn't born.

The doctor leech nodded. "They are all new—only months old to this life. Children, in a way. They will have no skill or strategy, only brute strength. Tonight their numbers stand at twenty. Ten for us, ten for you—it shouldn't be difficult. The numbers may go down. The new ones fight amongst themselves."

A lot of mumbling and small growling went through the pack after the doctor stepped back to his leech clan. See? What did I tell you? Ultimate monsters, that they would kill their own kind. This is why I detest them so much. Because they don't fucking care because they're heartless and dead. Take me for example. I had a life, a great and perfect one and now, look at me! I may be a physically looking monster but those leeches are the real monsters. Those mythical creatures and horrors, which kids hear in bedtime stories and fear of. This is what my life feels like, at the moment.

"Do you know when and how they'll arrive?" Sam finally spoke, after the muttering.

"They'll come across the mountains in four days, in the late morning. As they approach, Alice will help us intercept their path" the leech doctor said, gesturing to a tiny pixie like leech. Tiny leeches were much creepier because they looked kind of unpredictable. And what did he mean by 'help us intercept their path'? How the hell did they know when the others will come and where? Oh wait, I think I heard Jacob rambling before on how some particular leeches have special abilities (like I would listen to that idiot). Now that's even more reason not to help the leeches. If they had fucking abilities, we're going to get so screwed.

I settled down by an old tree stump as the leeches started to mutter more about the 'new-borns' (that's what they called the others) to the pack. The only good thing about this is that I get my revenge on these stupid leeches but the sucky part is that I have to work with these 'trying-to-be-nice' leeches. But according to legends (oh, yes those 'amazing' stories about our ancestors and 'cold ones'), the Cullens were different from other bloodsuckers. Instead of killing humans, they live of the blood of animals. How nice of them….not. They still are murderers and still have ruined many lives, including their own. I don't even know why God even made such creatures.

"Bella!" Jacob called out as I saw him dash towards someone who happened to stand opposite the leeches. Oh great, the cause of this trouble has come.

"Hey Jake" I could faintly hear her greet. Man, even when she talks, you feel like you want to kill her for some reason. I'm actually surprised that they leeches didn't kill her yet. I could barely see her small pale frame in front of Jacob's large one. She was as pale as the leeches. What is she, a leech wannabe? She looked so tiny and feeble; just plain weak. I turned my head away, letting out a small puff of air at how stupid Jacob was to choose a death-magnet like her.

"Careful Jacob, she's tired" a voice came from around her. That voice which made my ears perk up and eyes widen. A voice that seemed to be coming from someone next to Bella. That voice that was recognizable but not believable. A voice that seemed to make my body act on its own, by making me snap my head in that direction and instantly stand on all fours. Seth seemed to have heard the couple of branches I snapped, since he turned his gaze to me with eyes narrowed.

"Leah? Are you okay?" He asked, worried. I didn't realize that I looked very threatening yet bewildered. Just by that one voice, my whole mind blanked out and my body started to tremble.

"Oh great, what's up with her now?" Jacob said, finally tearing his gaze from Bella and rolling his eyes at me.

"Her?" Bella questioned and gazed at me, with wide eyes as mine mimicked hers, twice as much. But not at her reaction or the sight of her…no. It widened, because of the guy standing next to her. Not just any guy; a vampire. I felt a small raspy gasp escape my throat as his topaz eyes were brought to my eyes, narrowing them at me. Oh my god! This can't be…! No. no. no. NO! I felt myself start to let out harsh pants, while my legs started to tremble as if it would just collapse right now. I felt like I would fall. I cringed as I felt a pain surge through my body as I started to shake even more. Not because of anger but because of frustration, shock, pain and so much more.

"Leah, calm down" Sam spoke, watching me shake uncontrollably. The pack gazed at me like I was crazy and that I would just explode into a million pieces. I felt like I was about to crack. What am I doing here?! I forgot everything that I was grumbling about before as a rush of emotions took over my system. I couldn't think straight but all I knew is that I had to run. Run away from here, now.

With that thought only routing through my head, I turned quickly on my heel and dashed away into the depths of the forest ignoring the yells of my name as I pushed my paws even faster. I couldn't believe that I would come to this day that I hated myself even more than I hated those bloodsuckers. And as the call out of my names started to drown out, I swear I could hear that same cool and soothing voice, blown with the wind, through the forest and striking my very core as he said that one word that the others were trying to yell out, except his, was for a different purpose...more of a realization like I had just faced.

"…Leah…"

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**Dun Dun DUN! Yes, Chapter 2 is out and Yay! Tense is building and building until it explodes! You can thank me for coming with this chapter quite early because well, I'm awesome xPP **

**Leah finally sees Edward! And here you see how she's with the pack and all, and how it just suddenly changes when she lays her eyes on Edward! She's is sooo emotionally distressed and you'll see that in the next few chapters. The next chapter will actually be out quite soon since it's kind of mostly copy and paste =P **

**If you noticed this is set during Chapter 18 of Eclipse ('Instructions') since some of the dialogue was taken from that. There is a difference since I made the wolves arrive there early to meet Dr. Cullen and his family and then I made Edward and Bella join them better. Plus, I also made it that the pack turns into humans so they can communicate because it made more sense cause Edward wasn't around. I had to change this scene a bit to help with Leah's hatred towards Cullens and her revelation. I actually thought I would keep them all wolves and Leah realizes it's Edward when they sniff the Cullens but then I realized that her smell sense has changed since she's a wolf now so I made it this. This story will not change the pattern on how Eclipse goes but some scenes may differ and show some 'behind scenes' stuff, you could say with Edward and Leah (or anyone with Leah in general). **

**The reason behind the title of my story. The reason why I called it 'Fading Shadow' is because a shadow may be seen at times and not seen in others but you know that it's there. It's always there but at times you see it, or you don't. Edward is like Leah's shadow in this story. She sees him and sometimes doesn't but when she does, it affects her in ways (which will be explained in other chapters). And the reason why I said 'Fading Shadow' is because well it kind of alludes to the end on how Edward slowly moves away from her but still has an impact on her. So I hope now you know my main purpose for this story.**

**Anyways, that's it for now and I shall have the other chapter out soon or at least before I take my study break for this. Please tell the others who like Twilight fanfics, non cannon pairs, forbidden shit or just Leah and Edward in general, about my story if you think they might like it.**

**Reviews would be awesome and if you review, I'll…I'll….I'll give you Alice as a present. You could be best friends XDD (I know that was lame, but worth a shot). **


	3. Chapter 3

**Running from My Heart**

Just when I thought my life couldn't get any worse, this happens. I couldn't even bring my head to think how this happened. After all these years…these questions that I never actually asked the answers for…all these regrets, pain and loneliness…and then I see him. I pulled my knees closer to my chest, ignoring the squeaky sound of my feet dragged on the bathtub floor. I rested the side of my cheek on the hard denim which covered my rough knees. I ran from there. I couldn't handle it. It was just too bizarre…too unbelievable. Just seeing him there, draping his hand around that Swan girl's waist and holding her closely towards his body. It just hurt for some reason. I am going crazy! How can I be thinking this?! He's a fucking leech and I always fucking knew it! Then why am I acting like this?! Why am I acting like he still matters to me? He never did…

I held my chest and felt my heart race a bit as I closed my eyes, taking in its rapid rhythmic beats. Who was I kidding? He did matter…at that point at least. When I was vulnerable, alone, abandoned and felt I was about to die. I could still remember that day…like it was yesterday, when I felt my whole world fall apart…well, at least my heart.

_Tears streamed down my face like rivers of misery as I ran out of the front door, and saw the view of the forest; I didn't know where I was heading but I didn't care. I wanted to get away._

"_Leah! Please!" his voice faded as I ran further away; his voice strained in my head. I felt a sharp pain in my heart when his voice echoed in my head; I felt like I was going to collapse but I continued to run. I abruptly brushed my tears with my shirt sleeve but that didn't stop the waters to fall; my vision started to blur but nothing would make me stop._

_I finally entered the forest clearing, pushing past the tree branches; I felt the small pieces of twig, leaves and hummus pierce through my skin, but nothing compared to the pain that I felt inside. I knew that no one would come after me and that's what I wanted. I especially didn't want him to come after me after all that's happened; I couldn't believe this happened to me. I didn't know how fast I was running or what was ahead of me, and the next thing I knew I tripped on a tree stump, which flung me over, making me fall on my stomach on the forest floor. I let out a weak groan, trying to push myself up but I gave up and fell to my stomach again; I frustrated because nothing was working with me. I pounded the ground as the tears started to stream down harder and onto the forest ground. Nothing mattered anymore; I didn't have the strength to yell, to fight back, to get up, to walk, or to even breathe. My heart felt like it was about to fall out and die in front of me; I started to pound my chest to stop the pain. I don't want to feel what my heart feels; I don't want to do anything with my heart, anymore._

_Few moments of silence, all were heard was my silent sobs and my sobbing heart. I wish I could just stay here and decay away; away from here; away from him; away from life. The cold night's breeze ruffled the branches of the trees as well as caressing my long black hair; I shivered at the slight coldness it brought, but I felt so numb to care. Faintly, I heard footsteps coming closer towards me. Oh no, please let it not be him! Anything but him! I pleaded in my head; I just wanted this all to stop and end. The footsteps started to come closer and closer until it came to a stop, not far away from me. I didn't dare to look up; I shut my eyes and tightened my grasp on my knees, as the tears fell onto my lap. I heard a very low yet soothing breathing, leaning towards me and the next thing I felt, was a cold object get placed my head._

"_You shouldn't be out here but yourself, Leah" a very different icy and calm voice suggested. I brought my head a bit up, away from my lap and saw someone's blue jeans kneeling, in front of me. I crunched my eyebrows and wondered if it was him; nah, it couldn't be. He never wore proper jeans, always cut-offs. I slowly raised my head up to see the mystery being; my eyes widened when I saw the guy, kneeling in front of me._

_He looked about 17-18 years old; his short bronze locks, dangled downwards, making a style of its own; he had topaz colored eyes, the most beautiful colored eyes ever that was leering at me; his thin lips were in a shade of light pink and were in a line; he had almost perfect features and they were break taking. I realized that it was his hand that was place on my head as I gazed at his hand drop by his side; he was pretty pale but a very beautiful pale especially since the moonlight reflected on his skin, making him glow. He wore a blue shirt and a light blue coat; he wasn't from the reservation, clearly. But how could he have known my name?_

"_H-h-how do y-you…" I softly stammered as his topaz eyes bored into my eyes; his beauty was flawless. I felt his fingers slowly and softly caress my face and ran down my cheek; the coldness felt so calming._

"_You can't blame yourself for this, Leah. It's not your fault" he spoke again; his voice rang in my head like chimes. His hand then softly cupped my chin, making me slowly sit up on my knees; I was like a broken puppet and he was mending me. He slowly got to his feet, not breaking eye contact with me and then took hold my hands and gently brought me up onto my feet; if anyone else would have done this, I would have crumbled but somehow with him, it was an exception. He didn't let go of my hands; instead, he started to walk backwards, leading me somewhere. I didn't question him, I was too numb to care; my heart was still sobbing and banging against my chest._

"_He never meant to hurt you, Leah. This is how life is" he spoke in his softly icy tone, still holding on my hands and leading me. Finally, I was able to understand what he was talking about; he was talking about the reason for my immense heartache. I didn't question how he knew this; I don't even think I cared. _

"_Why does life have to be so unfair?" I finally answered, as the words scratched against the walls of my throat. His expression didn't change a lot but his eyes are filled with sympathy, not pity. I looked at a distance, but continued to follow his guide._

"_Why does love have to be this way?" I asked again, choking a bit; a tear rolls down my eyes. I then realized that we aren't walking anymore. Instead, we were at First Beach, by the shore as the moon's rays danced against the waves. I looked at my surrounding before I looked forward to see him, standing only 3 inches away from me. After all this time, I took a small breath in; he didn't seem be breathing either. He observed my face and then places his cold index finger, near my eyelid, the exact place where my pained tear rolled down and then puts his finger in his mouth. I watched him as he tasted my bitter sadness and then looked at my brown eyes again, boring into them. _

"_That's the heart talking…More like the heart's dying. No matter what you do, somehow the heart is involved and all it brings is pain" I softly whined as I felt more waters begin to fall._

"_I disagree" his icy breath brushed against my face. _

"_The heart is really important; that's where you know what's right and what's wrong. Otherwise, without it you're completely lost" his soothing voice, slowly made my tears to stop falling; I didn't glance up at him; I was too afraid to face the truth and pain caused by my heart, but I could feel his eyes on me. His long cold fingertips caught hold of my weak and numb hand as he lifted it up to my chest. I closed my eyes, tightly as I heard my heart, beating and fighting to stay alive._

"_As long as this heart beats, consider it something worth living for. There is a reason why you're gifted with such a wonderful organ" he whispered, still holding my hand against my chest; I kept my eyes tightened trying not to scream from the pain, that the heart caused me._

"_It's hurts, a lot. If it weren't there, a lot of lives would have been saved" I whimpered, at the fact that I was just one of those unlucky souls who will die because of this heart ache._

"_Being heartless, doesn't advantage anyone. All will be left is an empty void; nothing at all" he responded with a small sigh, leaning closer to me to catch a look at my face; but I just hid under my hair._

"_How do you know?" I softly cried; I would do anything right now, to take my heart out and throw it into the sea. I felt his hand move upon my hand, as he gripped it and moved it away from my chest and place it on something else solid. As soon as my hand was placed, all I could feel was…nothing. Like an empty shell; an eerie feeling went through me. I have never felt so awkward and empty about anything before. I slowly looked up and to see his hand placed on my hand, which was against, not an object but his own chest; the exact area where his heart is, or should be. My alarmed eyes moved up to look at his saddened expression as everything started to fall into place in my head._

"_Having a heart, would bring you pain but greater pleasure. Something that I lack" he pronounced sympathetically. A sudden rush of alarm runs into me; I knew who he was. He was one of those people. He was the reason that everything was going wrong; but somehow, I felt sad for him and comforted towards him._

"_I'm sorry, Leah that I'm the reason for your state. But there are some things in this world that God can't even change" he explained as he stroked my hair and put it behind my ear. I should have been scared or angry but no, I was comforted, stable and sympathetic towards him. I just gazed at his trance bronze eyes._

"_This is who I am. A mythical creature, an outcast, a monster" he said. _

"_You're not a monster" I replied to him, quietly. Even though he's one of them, he's no monster. He was so much more than that; he was better._

"_That's what you'll say now but you can't deny what I'm able to do" he argued back, tenderly. I took a step closer to him, closing the space between us; something drew me to him. My fingertips traced his features as he closed his eyes; he was perfect looking._

"_You were there when no one could help me; you're not a monster. And I don't know when this heart ache will stop though. I want it to stop soon" I choked, as a sudden heart pain hit me and I dropped my hand. He opened his eyes and looked at my pleading expression. He reached his hand out to my face, caressing my cheek before leaning into me. My eyes slowly fluttered close as I felt his cold lips touch mine; his cool breath trickled down my throat. Even though, his lips were slightly cold, it somehow was soft and molded with my lips. My hand went behind of his head as his other hand held my neck, in a gentle grip. My heart rate started to race, but the pain lessened with every touch; I didn't want to let go._

_But alas, he slowly pulled away from me, resting his forehead against mine. As soon as I got a release from his lips, I silently panted, feeling his cold forehead against my forehead along with his hand on my check. I closed my eyes, taking in the essence surrounding us._

"_It will stop soon. Don't worry Leah, you'll find something worth living for; worth beating for" he said, gently as his retracted his forehead from mine but still slowly caressing my cheek. I looked at him with sadness flooding my eyes. I needed him, through this; this heart ache; this time. He brought his face against my cheek and let out a small sigh; his breath tickled my cheek._

"_Don't worry, we'll meet soon…" he whispered and slowly pulled away, removing his hand along. I looked at him as he slowly walked backwards, with a small crooked smile on his face. It felt like this all wasn't real for a minute; it felt like it was all a dream._

I thought it was a dream but…who knew that, that dream would turn to what I feared the most. A possible nightmare, you could say. Seeing him again brought back everything…everything I went through…everything he promised…everything he said…everything he did…everything I felt towards him, in that moment. Sam merely faded away at that moment but he….he stayed for some reason.

"Leah! Leah, Open the door!" Seth yelled from behind the bathroom door, banging it hard, suddenly disrupting me from my dwellings. My head shot up at the door as I abruptly wiped off an unexpected tear that rolled down my eye.

"Dude, I don't know why we're even here" I heard another voice speak from behind the door. His voice was annoyed and bored.

"Because Sam ordered us to" A different, calm voice replied. Sam ordered them…Why am I not surprised?

"Leah! Open the door! What's going on?" Seth yelled again, sounding a bit worried. I just sat in the tub, staring blankly at the door which shook off unwanted chippings and dust of the wood.

"Yeah! Sam is totally going to kick your ass for running away like that! He's really pissed that you couldn't control yourself!" Quil announced.

"Dude, Don't agitate her!" Embry screamed. (Embry may be a bit of a pushover but he is a smart kid)

I couldn't handle this now. I didn't want to face Sam, or Jacob, or anyone in the pack right now. I instantly stood up and jumped out of the tub, almost tripping on the bathroom rug. I bit my lip as I watched the door shake with the amount of pressure that was on it. I ignored all the calls of my name and snorts (from Quil, at least) and ran to the bathroom window.

No one ever used our bathroom window since it was an invasion of privacy. Well we stopped using it and kind of jammed it after that incident that happened with Sam and me and my dad. I didn't want to get into that. I didn't want to think about anything. I just wanted to get out…just out. Luckily, being a werewolf has its advantages such as strength. I dug my fingers under the small opening at the bottom of the window frame that let the morning's light seep through and, took all the leftover strength in my body and started to pull it up. It was still pretty jammed so I started to bang my palms on the bottom to make the frame jump up a bit. I got a couple of splinters and scratches on my palms, but I would heal anyways. This was nothing compared to what I've been through and the possible trauma I'm going through now.

I was able to push the window half up. I guess I could squeeze through. I stuck my head into the sun's 'greeting' rays to check if it could fit as well to see how high the jump was. I guess it wasn't that much. I put my palms on the side of the window frame and pushed my upper body out of the window. I held my grip tightly on the sides as I slowly brought my leg out and set it on the edge of the window frame. Another advantage is that we were fit and never gained weight (I was always pretty fit and lean) but disadvantage is our huge height difference. It took a while before I could get my whole leg out of the window. When I was able to set both of feet on the window frame, I pushed my hands and body off the window and jumped down to the grass, landing perfectly on my feet. Agility is the key to a quick getaway which I happened to have.

I looked up back at the window before running without purpose towards the forest. I had no idea where I was going but again, all I had to do was run. That's all I've been doing lately. Just running away; from my past…from my feelings…from my heart…from my life…from the truth…from the realization…from even myself.

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**Yay! I told you this Chapter will be out soon. Like I said, copy and paste. If you don't know what I'm talking about or if you want to read the whole incident that happened in Leah's past, read my Oneshot 'Heart Of My Guardian Angel'.**

**Yay! Now you know why Leah ran away. And no! She did not imprint on Edward. It's not possible and makes no sense. That's why I'm working on this small tutorial/info story which is called 'Imprinting for Dummies' which will show what I think imprinting is and how people are sometimes mis-lead by it. Btw, this is set the next morning (well not the next morning exactly. atleast when the sun's up. The wolves probably stayed there the whole night and early morning and only came to check on Leah when the sun came up)The reason why it shocked Leah was because she thought she would never ever see him again and plus it's weird since she's got a grown hatred for the Cullens and it turns out that he's Cullen. Now you'll start to see Leah's confusion and thoughts and feelings and see how her human side still has an impact on her as well as maybe Edward.**

**The next chapter will be a bit tricky and long and will be out a lot later since I have to study and it's a lot of tension and description and confrontation *hint hint*. I have started working on Chapter 11 of MD but that also won't be out soon, most probably. So that's it that I can say for now. Check my profile for updates on my current stories, completed stories, future stories and just me in general. **

**Reviews would be great and if you review, Emmett and I shall give you a big Bear Hug! =D**


	4. Chapter 4

**Two Sided Door**

Peace and Quiet is all I needed at the moment, but it was just too hard to get those these days, with the one pack mind and also my thoughts screaming, bloody murder at me. Right now, I walking. Yes, I was walking away, from my house, from those annoying people who I am forced to all my 'pack', just from…there. I always thought my life was a mystery and that one day it would be solved but now it's just a question mark. A plain question mark. Nothing to solve, nothing to hide. Isn't life great when it's unpredictable?

No you asshole, it isn't. It's the fucking worst because then all you get in the end is pain. Cold no-mercy pain. Yes, I should know. After all that has happened with me and that guy I am forced to call my 'alpha'; or who was once known as…my Sam.

But that ship has sailed, along with everything I imagined with him. My future, my love, my life…my everything. Now I'm just one of his pack members, nothing more while he lives his sickening perfect life, the life that I imagined to have with him, with my darling unfaithful cousin. Romantic, isn't it? And what's even more annoying is that all the pack members know about it. Talk about loss of privacy. With Paul and his temper issues, Jared and his disgusting attitude, Sam and his "authority", Quil and his smart ass mouth, Embry and his lack of standing up for himself, and of course, Jacob and just the fact of his existence. I'm cruel, yes I know. That's what happens when your life feels like total crap. Oh, did I miss someone? I do insult and annoy and tease Seth a lot and sometimes he can be a total embarrassment but…he's family, he's my brother. I already lost two men in my life; I don't want to lose another. I may come off very mean and bossy towards him but that is because I love him, with all my heart and I made a promise to myself to protect Seth for mom's sake, dad's sake…and even my own.

I hadn't realized where my feet had subconsciously taken me but before I knew it, the surrounding changed from the same old forest to a place where I hadn't been in for a while now. A place which to others might be another forest clearing but to me, it was significant. I was standing right in the middle of the clearing as the large green trees towered over me, almost blocking out the sun's rays.

I can't believe I brought myself here. It's like from one dilemma, I jump to another. I looked around and recognized the dark spot where I had once fallen down, with tears forming into a puddle on the forest ground. It was as if I could still sense the cool breeze that night brought, along with my almost inaudible sobs, as I pounded the ground. The only thing that changed was that the area had become smaller since more trees and plants started to sprout, and also there was dead old tree fallen down, close to the area that I once lay. I felt a breath that I had been holding at the end of throat, come out at once. No matter what I do, the past just has to come back to bite in my ass, doesn't it?

I felt myself soften, for some reason as I slowly shuffled towards the large laying trunk. I stroked the rough, dry outer skin of the trunk as I felt its dead leaves brush against my feet. I let out sigh as I slowly sunk down onto the trunk, taking it all in.

_What has happened so far_

_What is happening_

_Where I stand_

_Why am I here_

_Who do I have with me_

_Do I have any say or choice in this_

I remember a much simpler time. A time where all these questions weren't needed to be asked because you already knew all the answers. A time when love was just love, when family meant everything, when life had a meaning. For me at least. And now…well, you know the rest.

Werewolf boyfriend runs off with your favorite cousin and due to anger and sadness, you morph into a werewolf too with your brother, causing your dad to die at the sight of you and right now, you are forced to work with other werewolves to protect our sworn enemies and their human pet. The usual high school drama, right?

God, you have no idea how sickening it is to think about the Swan girl. I mean, why the hell does she have to find the first monsters to hang out with? Does she not like having a normal life with people who don't sparkle, suck your blood, shed or morph? Well, I can't honestly be surprised that she doesn't have much of a social life. She's practically a walking corpse. But there is one question that is bugging me a lot now.

What did Jacob see in her? Or most importantly, what did…_he_…see in her?

It looked like they were together. I mean, the way he was holding her at the field and how protective he was of her when Jacob was talking to her. What is up with that? Why is she with him and like…like…ugh, this is soo frustrating.

I sunk my head into my hands as I let out small frustrated sigh. How…I mean…how? How the hell did he even meet her? Or what is he even doing here? Why does he have come back…now? And be with her? Wait, what is wrong with me? Why do I care about this leech? He's a leech for god's sake. But…I remember at that moment, I felt different.

He made me believe for a while that maybe men weren't all that same; that they cared. But I guess that was just for _that moment_. Besides, I don't think I classify him as _man_.

Ugh, why the hell does fate have to play with my life like this?!

"Fate's not playing with your life. Things just seem to have an unexpected way of coming up" a cool voice voiced, which happened to coming in front of me. Of course, I couldn't see who it was but I could recognize it fairly well by the cool and collected tone, as well as the smell it brought in. Oh great, this is just emphasizing my point even more. When I get up there, I'm gonna kick some ass.

"Wow, you certainly have a way with speech" he lightly chuckled as I heard him take a few steps closer. How the hell did he….shit, I forgot that some have 'abilities'. So he's supposed to be some mind raper or something? Great. There is no way that bloodsucker is getting any closer to me. I got enough energy to lift my head up to glance at this…pers-thing.

"What the hell are you doing here?" I jeered, gazing at his pale face. Woah, it may have been a couple of years but he looks just the same. The same bronze locks which was long enough to almost cover his forehead; His pale skin had a more subtle glow than how it looked that night and his topaz color eyes were almost piercing as he gazed at me, just like I did him; seeing each other after all this time.

"I came…I came to see you. I thought you'd be here" he stated, digging his hands into his coat pockets.

"Come to see me? What am I, a show piece? I am none of your concern. You can leave now and besides, It wasn't my intention to come here. Why would I come to this place? What good has it done me anyways?" I announced as I got off the trunk, crossed my arms across my chest, refusing to gaze in his direction.

"Leah…" he said which made me cringe. It was so weird that I cringed. It was as if it was Sam when he would call me that retched 'Lee-lee' nickname. I hated that this leech even knew my name, for some reason.

"Leah, I know you're mad at me…" he said, but was cut off by my scoff. I turned my gaze to him, taking a few steps towards him, feeling the irritation course through my face.

"I am soo beyond the point of mad, frustrated or annoyed. I mean, look at we are now. Why, why did you have to come back? Back here?" I grinded my teeth.

"I never left but I thought maybe you didn't need me at that time anymore…" he stated.

"I still don't need you. Who the hell do you think you are? You're a fricking leech. Why the hell would I need a leech in my life, after all that you have done? After the monster you've made me into?" my voice started to crack a bit. What the fuck is this? Why am I getting all over emotional? What did this bloodsucker do to me?!

"Leah, you are the last person I wanted this to happen to" he said, taking a step closer to me as remorse started to appear on his solid face.

"Ha, that makes me soo special" I sarcastically replied.

"But…seeing you, that night, was just…so abrupt" he said.

"You were a surprise too, believe me" I scoffed.

"And the fact that you're with…Bella? You really after those kind of girls huh? The weak and broken girls? Well, I should tell you that I've changed and I'm not those type of girls. I don't need your pity cause I'm not Bella. I'm not Bella" I yelled, gazing at him with stinging eyes. Stinging, from the frustration, and…some small amount of water building under them.

"I know…You're nothing like Bella" he simply answered. For some bizarre reason, I felt like I was going to collapse or just burst. Why…why is he doing this to me? Does he not know how this affects me?

"I do know, Leah" he whispered but enough for my wolf senses to pick up.

"That day…was the day I felt I was about die. And…I don't know how, you were able to pick me up and heal me for a small period of time. It was crazy but you did. I didn't know who you were, where you were from or what you did. I still don't…but I just gave myself to you" I replied softly. Then I felt my temper again greet me as my eyes started to hurt a bit.

"But then I got so frustrated because after that…you left. You left me, to just decay. You knew this all might happen yet you didn't give me any warning, no hint. I was an idoit for even listening to you when I realized who you really were. Then I felt so stupid to even think that you were trying to help me but you weren't. Prime example, me being the girl wolf" I cried, biting my lip.

"I didn't know what was to happen but I knew that I had to be there for you… just for that moment" he answered after his contemplating pause.

"Why? Why would you care about a freak like me?" I questioned, letting out a small sniff. Why would a bloodsucker care about me? What is so great about me that he would care? I saw his mouth open and then close, settling with a smile after a slight pause.

"...I'll tell you soon but now I have to go" he stated, turning to head towards the trees.

"Back…to your precious Bella?" I asked, letting out a bit of pain in my tone. He seemed to have sensed it since he froze and slowly turned to gaze at me, with a small pained expression.

"….Like I said, some things just unexpectedly have a way of showing up" he repeated for some odd reason and then a small smile appeared on his features. "By the way… my name is Edward. Edward Cullen."

And with that he was gone. I let out a couple of raspy breaths before running my hand through my hair. I let out a small sniffle that had unexpectedly appeared with my conversation with….Edward. Wow, that was just so bizarre. I don't know why but it was as if all my emotions started to play with my mind. Cullen. Oh great, he was them which means, I'll have to see him…almost every time. I always knew he was different from others but not this different.

My thoughts were cut off by a familiar scent and not a welcomed one. Well, not welcomed by me. I turned in the opposite direction only to see that oaf Jacob, standing a good 10 feet away from me, shirtless as usual.

"There you are. You shouldn't just run off that way. You have no idea how ticked off Sam's gonna get" Jacob stated, annoyed. That really ticked me off. Here, after all this time, I'm back where I started. Being a pack pup. And again, Sam's order, Sam's command, Sam, Sam, Sam, ugh! And to have this jackass to tell me what to do, after all the trouble he's put me through is the limit.

"Don't you dare tell me what I should or shouldn't do! If you haven't noticed I'm a big girl!" I yelled, clenching my fists.

He looked away, rolling his eyes and letting out tired sigh. He's probably thinking this is typical Leah, that dipshit.

"When will you ever learn to mind you own fucking business?! Is your life that pathetic that you have to bore me to death or is your Bella too fragile to play with a mutt like you?" I growled at him.

"God, Leah. I was just saying that Sam would—"

"I don't give shit what Sam says! And you're telling me to listen to Sam when you yourself is rebelling against the all mighty alpha! I know you're the rightful Alpha but you don't need to rub it in!"

"What the hell are you blabbing about, Clearwater?!"

"I am soo fucking frustrated with you! Not only do I have to protect leeches in order to protect your precious Bella but the worst is that I have to put up with a numbskull like you! A person who doesn't know enemies from friends or who is soo pathetic to even like a girl like Bella! She runs with leeches so let her go!"

"FUCK OFF, CLEARWATER!"

"THAT'S WHAT I WANT YOU TO DO"

"God, I'm soo through with you! You're nothing but a bitch!" he yelled, shaking a bit as he stormed off.

"FEELING'S MUTUAL, BELIEVE ME!" I yelled back, stalking him as he stormed out of the clearing. I heard his low cussing as he pushed past bushes and branches before reaching the view of my house. I slowed down, staying back behind the trunk of the tree as I saw Jacob storm towards Seth and Embry, who were standing outside the house. Thanks to my 'awesome' wolf senses, I could hear their conversation.

"Your sister's a bitch, you know that" Jacob growled at Seth, clenching his fists.

"Oh no" Embry merely muttered.

"You found her? Where is she?" Seth asked, a bit worried.

"The hell I care! Next time, anything involves Leah, count me out!" Jacob snarled as he abruptly left, clenching his jaw.

That's when I got out of the bushes and made my way towards the house. Embry was the first one to see me, and sent a nudge to Seth. Seth turned to gaze at me and had a disapproving look on his face. My expression was neutral as I reached the door, and about to take hold of the doorknob.

"Wait Lee…" Seth announced; I paused. "What did you do now? Why do you have to be like this? First you run off, and then you run off again and then you piss off everyone. Why do you have to ridicule everyone? Why do you make everyone's life so hard? It isn't fair to just hurt people for reasons that aren't their fault."

There was a silent pause. My hand was still extended to the doorknob and, Seth and Embry hadn't moved. I dropped my gaze from the door, down to the ground as I replied in a neutral tone.

"Welcome to my life" and with that I opened the door, and slammed the door shut behind me.

* * *

**Hello! Yes, thousand apologizes. I am just soooooo busy lately, it's not even funny. **

**Plus, I was totally blocked when it came to this. It was as if I had the overall concept but the structure and some other stuff were kind of muddled up. So if you see, this wasn't the best. It was very =S. I'm sorry; I kind of lost my touch in this. I hope I get it back though because I really want to continue with this. This wasn't the best, I know and I'll make sure that the next one would be A LOT better, believe me.**

**So yeah: They meet again, in the same place but different time. As you can kinda see how Leah's emotions aren't exactly planned out right. She's very confused at the moment. She doesn't know what to think, what to believe or what to do. As for Edward, well, he understands what Leah is going through and is trying to help in a way if Leah stops pushing him away. You'll see in the other chapters what Edward kind of thinks of Leah or have you acts with Leah and all.**

**There are only 3 more chapters left for this story. I told you before, this is a short Fanfiction and plus it happens during Eclipse. The next chapter would be again a Leah and Edward meeting but this time it gets more…intimate.**

**Reviews would be great =) **


	5. Chapter 5

**Wash Away my Sanity and Come Clean**

It had been days. Weeks actually, since my encounter with…Edward. It was weeks since the leeches started to have night 'classes' with the pack, to teach them about some fighting tactics to defeat the new-borns. According to the fortune telling leech, the time of their arrival is coming sooner and their numbers have doubled over the time. Great, just great isn't it? I mean it would be total payback to destroy some leeches but just the thought of thousands of bloodsucking, red-eyed, stinking leeches crawling around the streets is enough to make any wolf puke.

Jacob has been so paranoid and pissed off lately that sometimes I don't even bother trying to calm him down (it's not like I want to) but it's fun to see him lash out whenever I bitch about Bella. Thank god she hasn't been coming to the classes; otherwise I would have made some serious damage. It's bad enough that we have side with leeches but if Ms. Loves-Supernatural comes, I swear I would scream.

It's also bad enough that I see…Edward, every time I have to go for those night 'classes'. I go for the classes with Seth, Embry and Jared and _he_ always seems to be there.

Torture, much?

I mean all of the sudden, I feel so insecure and angered every time I see _him_ there, just gazing at me. It's kind of weird like he's trying to rummage through my mind, trying to see what I'm thinking. Well, since most of the pack can't pick up what I'm thinking since I'm so good at hiding them, I doubt _he_ would either.

But I couldn't help to ignore this strange feeling that I feel inside, every time he looked at me. Not exactly that tingly girly sissy feeling but…something else. It was hard to explain. It's just that I felt weak, insecure yet at the same time angered at the fact that I felt that way. Just the intensity in his eyes was just so…oblivious to me. Like in a way he was trying to say something without actually opening his mouth.

Could these Cullens get anymore weirder?

I know this shouldn't be bothering me since I barely knew Edward but for some reason, it does. I mean…I don't know. It now really bugs me that he's with a girl like Bella. Bella, of all people. Isn't it kind of frowned upon to be with a human? Especially a human as pathetic as her?

That jackass Paul thinks that the only reason I dislike Bella is because I'm jealous. ME? JEALOUS OF BELLA?! What an idiot he is! Why would I be jealous of that weakling?! She can't handle her own life so that's why she would rather bother others and become vampire chow. I sometimes don't blame the red haired leech wanting to desperately kill Bella which kind of pisses Jacob and also…a bit of Edward off.

But it was not like we could run away from it. It was our 'duty' after all, to protect our families and land. God, this statement had Sam's authority barfed all over it but apparently it's our destiny and our 'job'. To be our land's puppies.

I had gotten tired of tossing and turning in my bed for reasons in my head that didn't even make sense. I sat at the edge of my bed, massaging my ankle from the hard grip one of the leeches got hold off last class. Don't worry; I managed to throw him through two trees. That was my highlight of that evening. Thank god tonight I don't have to suck up to those leeches. It was Sam, Jacob, Quil and Paul's turn this time. I bet those leeches would be having a tough time with that jackass Paul, snapping at them every five seconds.

_Okay, third time's the charm right?_ I thought again, positioning myself against the bed back board, trying hard to get some rest before the 'big' day. I lay back against the bed rest and closed my eyes, trying to get moments worth of peace and quiet.

"Having trouble sleeping?" a honey coated voice entered my world. I frowned and peeked through my eyelashes, dreading to see him again. But there he was, resting against the window sill and his topaz colored eyes locked on me, as he slowly moved away from the open window. _God, someone really hates me up there._

"What the hell, do you think you're doing here?" I felt a small snarl erupt from my throat as I glared at Edward slowly standing at the edge of my bed. _Great, my room is going to smell of leech. _

"I never got to finish what I was going to say" he politely said, digging his hands in her jacket pockets.

"So YOU came to MY HOUSE?" I practically yelled at him, slowly pulling myself up to sit up properly, not breaking eye contact.

"I had to see you" he whispered, maintaining her voice volume, unlike me. Give me a break, why would he care?

"You know you're breaking the treaty right?" I narrowed my eyes at me.

"I know but I had to see you" there he goes again.

"JUST GET THE HELL OUT OF MY ROOM"

"Leah, hear me out"

"Hear you out ON WHAT? I don't want to do ANYTHING with you! I DON'T EVEN KNOW YOU! So stop acting like you know or care about me cause it's all bullshi—" and I was cut off. Not by his words but the feeling of something cold, pressed against my lips. It took me a while to register that it was his lips that were pressed against my own. It was really weird at first but I suddenly surprised myself when I started to kiss him back!

_What am I doing?! This isn't right! He is a leech and he's kissing me, literally! Why am I kissing him back??_

I don't know why but…there was a strange sensation. Loving, caring, emotions that I had forgotten; lost in my misfortunes. You would think I would be repulsed by this but…strangely, I wasn't. It wasn't that amazing but it was…interesting. It was as his cold lips were nicely molding with my own. Like it created a strange yet alluring sensation that tempted both of us.

Until I felt the cushion collide with the back of my head was when I realized that we were laid on my bed, him on top of me but not exerting his weight on me; it was just his lips. Both our lips moved in a rhythmic sync while his palms were placed on the bed, on the sides of my head while mine were gently touching her solid chest.

Whoa. This is different from Sam's pushy love. Who knew? A relationship that was not physical could be so pleasurable? I mean what I had with Sam was love but this…I couldn't put it with the same label. But in a way, it was caring and understanding compared to the rough love and desperate kisses I got from Sam.

We finally pulled away after a long time, staring into each other's eyes. I noticed his topaz eyes fully for the first time, taking in the way that they glimmered in the moonlight. They were actually pretty amazing. I watched as Edward gazed at me, before slowly and simply planting a touching kiss on my lips. A lot less intense and emotive than the first one. I just lay there, before him as he slowly pulled away, not too far away but enough for me to feel his cool breath against my almost numb lips.

"I have to go" he huskily said, and then I no longer felt his coolness over me. Just as I sat up, I saw him throw me a small yet apologetic smile before disappearing out of my window.

There he goes again… leaving me, blank and just confused as I was before. Actually, right now I'm even more confused. _What the hell was that?! Did he just…?_

I placed my fingertips on the lips, feeling his coolness slowly get heated up again to my normal body temperature. He did kiss me. The real question is…why? I mean…why? He's with Bella and he…kissed me? Why would he do that? Why would he come all the way here, breaking the treaty, to see…me? My mind was again crawled with these questions and even more confusion and frustration…all because of him.

_ARGH! DAMN YOU, LEECH! DAMN YOU EDWARD!_

"Leah, you there?" a voice was heard from behind my door, followed by a loud knock. I unclenched and clenched my fists as I shot a nasty look at the door, before taking some few calming breaths.

"No, this is the fairy godmother. Want me to stuff you into a pumpkin chariot?" I snorted, shaking off all the leech I felt all over me, and moved to sit at the edge of the bed.

"Ha, ha very funny. Can you let me in?" Seth stated, knocking on the door again. I rolled my eyes, running my hand through my hair before getting up and opening the door to my dimwitted brother. He entered the room, shirtless (not a pretty sight for me) and seemed like he had some good news (ha! Like there was _any_ good news to report). He paused for second before shaking his head and going back to his normal stance. I think he recognized the odd scent but it was a good thing that he wasn't fully aware how to fully recognize a leech's scent. Or he probably thought that it was from our previous visit from the Cullens.

"Hey Leah, mom was wondering if you wanted to eat anything" Seth said, ruffling his shaggy hair.

"No, thanks" I replied, crossing my arms across my chest.

"You sure? Cause you haven't eaten much all day"

"I said no. Is that all?" I asked.

"Well, kind of but I have news. Great news, well for me but it's good news" Seth beamed. Is there a mute button on this kid?

"Spit it out, Seth" I rolled my eyes.

"Okay, well I went over to see Jacob and Sam because they had called me over to ask me something. I also wanted to convince them to let me in on the fight" I shot a glare at Seth. No way are we letting him on the fight.

"But turns out they had a special assignment for me" Seth explained, hardly being able to contain himself.

"What special assignment?" I questioned.

"Well, since I'm not going to be in the fight, Jacob and Sam decided it was best if I did something that would benefit all of us"

"I'll bite. What is it, Seth?" I moaned, getting irritated with his stalling. He does that a lot when he has 'exciting' news.

"They want me to be with Bella…" _a small twinge ran through my body._ "…in the forest, with her and Edward" _Twinge._ "To protect her and also stay in contact with the pack…" _Twinge again._ "So in that way, I'm not left out of the fight!"

Oh my god, how could they do this?! That chick is a magnet for danger! And to let my brother, _my little brother_, to be with her in the middle of the forest, during a battle is…a death sentence!

"WHAT?!" an outburst erupted from me, as I clenched my fists but Seth was too excited to notice.

"I know! Isn't that cool?" he exclaimed.

"NO!" I yelled, feeling myself shaking a bit. Seth peered at me before the smile on his face slowly dropped and started to realize the anger in my voice.

"NO! NO WAY IN HELL, ARE YOU GOING TO GO ANYWHERE NEAR THAT GIRL!" I yelled, digging my nails deeply into my palms.

"Why Leah? I want to help too" he replied, coming closer to me.

"No! You will not do that!"

"But Jacob said that…"

"I don't give a FUCK what Jacob says! I said you will not be in the forest that day!" I glared at him, trying so hard not to lose it in front of him.

"What the hell, Leah?! Can you hear yourself? They need us and I want to help them protect Bella!" Seth declared.

"We'll handle it! You on the other hand should stay back in La Push!"

"What?! Leah, they need me there!"

"NO, I NEED YOU HERE!"

"WELL, IT'S NOT YOUR DECISION ANYWAYS!" Seth yelled back.

"YES, IT IS!"

"NO, IT ISN'T! IT'S THE PACK'S DECISION NOW! You have no say in this. This is our duty and I'm following it! And you should do the same!" Seth announced, crossing his arms across his chest, clearly looking like he was a bit pissed at me.

"I'm just trying to protect you" I hissed between my teeth, closing my eyes and still clenching my fists.

"No, you just want to bossy and I don't need to be looked after. Cause we are meant to protect others before protecting ourselves. You know you that, Leah! Then again, maybe don't because you aren't the same sister of mine as before. Where is that sister of mine? She would have understood what this means" Seth replied.

_She's there, somewhere inside that's why she's trying so hard to protect you. _But somehow Seth didn't see that. He didn't see how much it pained me that he was walking towards his death. He was so young. Doesn't he know how it feels like for me to feel another person that I love walk towards his death? To see another person who meant soo much to me, ignore my pleadings and walk away from his own life in order to protect another that wasn't even worth it? It is pissing me off that he doesn't understand how much this affects me; how much it hurts me.

"…Get out" I whispered, taking small soothing breaths. I could still feel Seth's hard gaze on me.

"I said GET OUT OF MY ROOM, SETH!" I cried, opening my eyes to a death glare at him. Seth took a bit taken back like he noticed a hint of sadness or pain in my voice before sighing and leaving my room. I ran and slammed the door shut. I pounded the door a couple of times before slamming my back against the door, digging my nails into the door's varnish.

_They promised me that they would keep Seth away from all of this. He promised he wouldn't hurt my family again! He promised!_

I gazed above at the ceiling, feeling my eyes become glassy. _Oh please god, stop!_ I begged for the tears not to fall but it was telling the clouds not to rain down on La Push. A small whimper escaped my lips before I gave up and slowly slid down the door, dragging my nails down on the wood as well. A tear rolled down my cheek.

My body landed on the floor with a thump and my hands buried itself in my hair and wandering all around my face, smearing the tear all over my face. What has my life come to?

Why is everything like a question that would never be answered? Why is my life so messed up? Why would everyone that I love move away from me? Is there no justice in this world? I never wanted this, any of this. First Sam, then my dad, then Edward and now…Seth.

Edward…why is he in my life? Is he my eternal punishment? I didn't want anything to do with him then why is it that he a necessity in my life? Why is leaving me untold and unanswered? I think I am going to go insane.

Why is it that just when things start to come clean, they are raveled up in more to be solved? I don't have the energy or the strength to do this. What is my reason for being here?

Why am I, who I am?

A beast, a monster, a she wolf, a freak, a bitch, a harpy… just Leah?

* * *

**SorrySorrySorrySorry NikaNikaNikaNika. Lolz, Sorry got caught up in song. It's a Korean pop song if you're wondering (random, I know :P). Anyway, I am soo sorry that I am late on updating. MAJOR WRITER'S BLOCK! I HAD LOST MY INSPIRATION COMPLETELY! IT SUCKS. Seriously, I have like three oneshots and MD on hold because of this temporary loss of inspiration. I still think I'm not fully recovered but fingers crossed, that I do recover. **

**Okay so this chapter is well…after a few weeks after Edward and Leah's encounter. They kiss (oh la la), BUT she isn't sure what it means. It was pleasurable but there wasn't an exact meaning for it. Curiosity builds. That's why I made Edward always disappear before something real happens (MUAHAHAH I'M EVIL ;3). The whole Seth and Leah conversation was to show their relationship and how much Leah actually cares for Seth. The ending for me was a bit 'ehh' but it's basically to show Leah's questioning her existence, her transformation and just about everything. But most importantly, questioning the reason why Edward's in her life (dun dun dun). **

**I have no clue when the next chapter will be out, soon or late. The next chapter would be the mountain scene which is when they all go to the mountains to prepare for the battle (OMG =LL). And there will be a revelation. Leah's and Edward's (OOOHHHHH!)**

**Reviews would make Edward come to your room and plant one on you too ;)) **


	6. Chapter 6

**Dreaming or Déjà vu?**

Today was _the_ day.

The day where the 'newborn' bloodsucking army was to arrive, at this area, in order to kill the pathetic Swan Girl.

Remind me again why I'm against their motive?

_Because last time we checked, you're supposed to protect our reservation_ a thought entered my head. God, can't a girl get some peace and quiet?

_Apparently not_ I growled at his thought.

_I didn't ask for your smart ass comments, Call. What happened? The bastard child is getting cozy with the bitch now?_ I shot back at the dark grey wolf, who tottered in front of me.

_You wish._

_No, I really don't_.

I saw him try and roll his enormous wolf eyes. Hey, I'm the only one who can master that move.

_Leah, Embry, Dr. Cullen wants to talk to us and inform us of some information that the future seeking leech gathered. Phase back_ Sam's thought sliced through my head. Ugh, first the bastard child had to ruin my mood this morning and now, Mr. Alpha had to join. Just great.

_We didn't ask for your comment, Leah and besides, nothing can ruin your mood just as much as you ruin ours_ Embry snorted. I let out a small snarl before sweeping my paw across the snow, making snow and small ice blocks to smash against Embry's gigantic wolf head.

_Bitch!_ He let out a small yell when an ice piece hit his eye hard and then turned to me, growling. Oh I was ready for him to, in my attack position. But then a black wolf stood in front of another fight that I was about to engage in.

_Enough! Phase now_ he barked at both of us. Embry cussed in his head before running into some snow covered bushes to phase back. The black wolf then turned his gaze at me. I felt myself cringe at his look but shook it off.

_Leah…_ he said, in that voice. Ugh, he should really stop it.

_Sorry Mr. Alpha but I would like to keep my fur on, thank you very much_ I stated and then sat down at my spot. Normally he would have used that horrid alpha command on to phase immediately, but he didn't. Instead, he sighed and slowly walked towards the bushes too. I felt two familiar shivers run through my body and then I felt my body at peace, at the fact that they both phased back.

I guess, he just wasn't in the mood for me. When has he ever been? Ever since he and Emily announced their engagement, he didn't dare to look at my direction. Mainly, because he just simply didn't care. Congratulations, you ass. I was really lucky that Embry and Sam had phased back and didn't hear my thoughts. I was really lucky that the whole pack had phased back earlier the day. I saw Embry and Sam come out of the bushes in their usual cut-offs and were heading down the small hill to meet the rest of the pack and Cullens. Not before glancing over at me: Embry with his glare and Sam with his pity gaze.

Well, fuck them. I wish I could show them to middle finger but it's really hard to do that when you have paws. I was freezing my furry little ass off out here, in the middle of the vast forest. It was nice to be alone finally. You would think that they would leave me but I was soo wrong.

We had camped right here, last night and the guys thought it was best if we were in wolf form. It was the perfect idea until I realized that I had to try and sleep with about 7 guys in my head. Every girls' dream right? To have seven guys who have their own pathetic lives to annoy you with and don't even give shit about you? Yeah, I'm _totally_ living the dream.

And what was worse was when we were getting ready to sleep. I mean, the idea of having vampires surrounding you while you sleep, being soo close to kill you in your sleep like Freddy Krueger (except without the scarred face and clawed glove, but that could be adjusted easily) is pretty bloodcurdling. But not only that, but Sam slowly strolled towards me and offered, actually _offered_, to sleep next to me. I mean, what the fuck?

What is wrong with this guy? I mean, he's with my so-called cousin and now he wants to sleep with me? I mean, sure not that way but still!

_Trying to take advantage of me, oh dearest alpha? Gonna make me beg by using the alpha command? No thanks, but I think we both know that no way in hell I'll do that for you, jacka_ss. _We both know that I've crossed that fucking ass bridge_ was what I told that giant fucking black wolf. He cringed while I heard a few sniggers and a small growl between the other wolves. I was guessing it were those new pups who sniggered.

_Fine, but I would like you to refrain from using that language in front of the pups_ he sighed, and slowly turned to walk away.

_Fuck, fuck ass, fucktard, fuck loser, fucking hell, fuck, fuck, and fuck!_ I snorted, which earned more chuckles from the cubs. The alpha stopped in his spot. Of course, he shouldn't have trusted me to listen to him.

_Silence! Now, Leah_ he spoke, in a booming tone. I was about to say more, but…I couldn't. I somehow felt tired and I couldn't retort to him. I moved my stunned eyes to the wolf, who didn't even turn around to look at me. That…That asshole had used the Alpha Command on me! I heard Jared and Quil say 'serves her right' as Sam slowly walked away, towards the woods, for his small night patrol. My mind was at the state of shock. I mean purposely abusing the authority of the Alpha and shut your ex girlfriend is just soo fucking pathetic and just incredible low.

Not only did I want to kick his furry fat ass, but I was incredibly hurt. I couldn't believe this man. I felt the courses of pain, run through my spine, not of the anger for him, but of the pain at the fact that I had just become one of his lapdogs. I was just his fucking bitch, literally.

I sighed, slowly resting my enormous wolf head on top of my paws. Even though I wanted my peace and alone time, I felt a bit too alone. I felt like even though I desperately wanted to be alone, to just be left alone, I felt a tiny bit saddened that I was alone in this vast fucked up world. Yeah, yeah, I'm getting all sentimental and emo.

…_Seth?_ I called out in my mind, hoping that my brother could hear me. It had been days since Seth spoke to me after we had that fight. He completely devoted himself to the pack and his job of staying with the girl and other leech. I heard him mutter a little almost every time I spoke, but not directly to me.

_...Come on Seth, speak. You're good at that_ I sighed. I knew that he was awake and he could hear me but he's actually getting really good at the silence treatment, which is a first. I heard Seth vaguely muttered 'trying not to talk to you, so shut up' as he continued to view the tent that Bella, Jacob and the leech were in. Man, that would have been a _fun_ night for that excuse for a girl.

I wasn't concentrating on what happening from Seth's eyes such as Jacob coming out the tent and started pacing around the area. I was concentrating on getting my baby brother to at least say one word to me. How does he not understand that I'm just trying to protect him? How does he not know that I fear, fear my life, if something happened to him? He could get hurt just standing next to that klutz. Yeah sure maybe I came off kind of abrupt but can you blame me?

_Yes…_ I heard someone mumble and I rolled my eyes at how stubborn my brother was.

_You're the one to talk_ Seth huffed softly that I couldn't almost hear, but I did and I guess I had to agree with it. A bit. Seth was still mumbling and trying his hardest not to listen or answer me. I huffed and decided to give up. I'm not going to sink so low and start begging my brother to at least say one word to me. I was already having such a fucking lousy time.

Damn Edward! Damn Bella! Damn bloodsuckers! Damn the pack! And Damn Jacob Black, for fucking getting me into this!

…Today was going to be a long day.

That's when a sharp painful screech ran through my head, which came out twice as bad since I heard it through Seth's head too. I suddenly got up, cringing and squeezing my ears shut to stop that horrid noise. It stopped and I finally was able to catch my breath, straightening my body. I was able to see, from Seth's eyes, a russet blur pass by.

_Jacob!_ Seth called out, standing up, trying to follow the blur with his eyes. Bella came out of the tent, holding his tiny body and looked like she might just ball. Psh, like I care.

_Great, what happened to the drama queen now?_ I snorted, shaking the snow out of my fur. Jacob is getting even more annoying and whiny lately, it's just getting absurd.

_Shut up, Leah _Seth growled, slowly sitting down as Bella just looked at him, guilty. Finally, he spoke to me, but just to growl at me. _Nice,_ now Jacob has my brother rubbing off him.

_Why?_ I snorted, and heard the bushes ruffle. Then suddenly in front of me, there was a huge russet wolf, standing tense and rigid. I turned myself to face him, about to roll my eyes at him before I caught a view of the wolf's face. His face made my scowl turn confused and almost…saddened.

The russet wolf's nose was down and his massive eyes were sparkling with water till a large oversized tear rolled of his nose. I heard the pack and Cullens come up the hill, probably since everyone would have heard that howl. I was the only one who saw that tear, before he blinked it away and just suddenly dashed off.

"Jacob…" I heard Embry call out, and heard him and I think Quil, getting ready to run after him before they were stopped.

"No, let him be…" Sam announced. "He'll be fine. No one go after him…Let's go"

"You sure?" Quil asked.

"Let's just get planning. The time is coming near" The Alpha spoke again and as usual, the others had to agree to him. I heard them shuffle and head back down the hill, with the Cullens' by their side.

This entire time, I just gazed at that particular spot that Jacob had just been. For some reason, I could feel Jacob was no more in wolf form, but somehow that wave of pain still running through my system. Something about his expression was gripping and almost too hard to ignore. I had never seen that…on anyone, especially not on Jacob Black.

After I heard the silence around me, something made me phase back, put on my clothes and made a run _after_ Jacob. I don't know why but I wanted to find out why. I didn't know where he was but his scent seemed fresh enough for me to find. Plus, the massive wolf prints were also huge giveaway.

* * *

I am so glad I was a fast runner, wolf or not. It didn't take me long to find that guy. I stood behind a huge pine tree, and peered to the side to see Jacob standing in the middle small clearing, his back facing me, his fists clenched and his head ducked down. I could tell that he was trying so hard not to just scream or collapse. I heard a small sniff escape from him, which made me even more confused and even more curious.

_Why the fuck do I care? And what the hell am I doing here?_ I suddenly realized. I mean, I never really gave a tiny rat's ass about Jacob Black, then what provoked me to following that drama queen here?

I turned to leave him but then I heard a gush of wind. I turned around to see Edward standing next to Jacob, about ten feet away from Jacob, his shoulder pointed towards me but his frame facing Jacob. I saw Jacob tense a bit before a growl escaped his lips. I watched his rigid body slowly turn to face the leech. I nearly was thrown back by the look on his face. His face was vivid and his eyes were red, probably a bit from bloodshot but was now masked with complete anger and hatred for the leech standing in front of him.

Normally, that's a warning to a person to just run for their life but Edward didn't move. He kept his hands in his pants' pockets and his feet planted to the ground, with snow burying them. I decided that right now, this wasn't the place to be but I was stupid enough to actually be there. _Great job, Leah._

I realized that Edward could hear my thoughts but he didn't move. He didn't even glance over; he was just staring at Jacob. I guess, he didn't hear me. I better be quiet now.

"What the fuck…do you want?" Jacob spat, with so much hatred. He didn't speak to Sam, Paul, to anyone with soo much of hatred; not even me.

"I came to check on you" Edward merely said.

"I don't need you fucking concern!" Jacob growled, taking one steady step towards Edward. Uh oh, looks like there is going to be a battle of its own here.

"Jacob, Bella was worried" Edward said, mentioning that leech lover's name.

"_Worried?_ Why would she be worried? She has you, doesn't she?" Jacob barked, turning his back to Edward. I just rested on the tree, peering from the bark, keeping most of myself behind the tree. Whoa, did Jacob just diss his supposed love of his life? Call the news! I'm cracking this story wide open!

"Jacob, you don't need to take this out on Bella" Edward stated, taking one step towards him but stopped when Jacob growled.

"Don't. you. Even. Try. To. Tell. Me. What. To. Do. Like you haven't did do enough already" he harshly articulated, looking to the trees ahead.

"Jacob…" Edward spoke again but Jacob cut him off, abruptly facing the leech in front of him.

"Shut up! Just shut up! Don't say anything! I don't fucking want to hear anything, bloodsucker" Jacob screamed, with a warning tone. I cringed at how harsh Jacob's tone was. That is a lot of anger to come from someone.

"You can't believe you did this…" Jacob snarled, after a moment of silence. " I can't believe you could sink this low."

"_I can't believe you would do this to me!"_

"_I didn't mean too…"_

"It wasn't intentional" Edward stated.

"Don't fucking lie! You wanted me to find out! You knew that I was outside and you purposely said that so that I would hear!" Jacob yelled, pointing an accusing finger at Edward but Edward was calm.

"You had to find out sooner to later, Jacob" Edward shrugged. I raised my eyebrow at what could have possibly gotten Jacob so hurt. Unless…

"Why? Why…would you do this?" Jacob's tone had a pleading and quivering edge to it.

"_Why…why would you do this? Why to me?"_

"I had to do what I had to do, Jacob" Edward spoke.

"God, I thought I had time…she loves me, I know she does and she knows it too, somewhere inside, you know?" Jacob stated.

"_He loves me. He said he loved me more than anything and I love him"_

"I know" Edward answered.

"I was going to give her everything. I want to give her everything. She's everything to me" Jacob exclaimed, running her hand, roughly through his hair.

"_I gave everything to him! He's everything to me!"_

"I know" Edward again answered.

"I can't live without her. She's become my life" Jacob stated.

"_He's practically my life"_

"I know" Edward again answered.

"_I know" she softly answered_.

"Then why?" Jacob asked, almost in a demanding tone.

"_Then why?"_

"Because maybe I can offer her a bit more…" Edward sighed.

"What? What more can you offer? I LOVE HER GODDAMNIT! SHE MEANS THE WORLD TO ME! I LOVE HER" Jacob roared, stomping his foot on the ground, which actually almost made the ground shake.

There was a slight silence. Only Jacob's husky breaths filled the clearing. I'm pretty sure me and Edward weren't breathing at that moment. Then slowly Edward took two steps towards Jacob, unphased even when Jacob growled at him again.

"You may love her…but I love her _more_" Edward softly spoke. Those words not only knocked the breath out of Jacob but myself. I held onto the tree, letting out a small gasp.

"_You m-may love h-him…b-but…I think I love him…more" _

Emily's soft yet agonizing words rushed through my mind. That was the moment, I had felt my insides twist and turn and my heart shatter a million times. My eyes had clouded with tears, threatening to fall at that point and I rushed out of her house, unable to even look at her.

That's what I did right now. I walked away from the clearing. What the fuck? Wha-what the fuck was that? I mean…how…what? What just happened?

I pushed myself past the trees, dragging my feet through the forest, trying to find a way out. A way out of the forest; a way out of this life; a way out from this position; a way out from this confusion.

That was so…bizarre. The position. The talk. The emotions. The shattering. The pain.

It was all too similar. It was almost déjà vu.

No, no it can't be. But hearing them talk and the jolting of that horrid memory put me in a spin. I rubbed the left side of my chest and I rested against tree, trying to catch some air.

What the hell was that? Why the hell do I care? Why is it affecting me? It has nothing to do with me.

"It does…indirectly" his voice blew towards me, and as a reflex, I let out a growl and looked with sudden anger towards the leech. And like how he was with Jacob, he didn't cringe or phase.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" I hissed.

"You know it does have to do something with you" he merely stated. I let out a growl at how annoying he's being. Figured, he would have heard me in the clearing; that bastard leech.

"No it doesn't, ass munch. Now fuck off" I snarled and turned to stalk away.

"Are you sure?" he asked and I stopped in my spot, slowly turning to him with a snarl building between my lips.

"Why the fuck would you care, huh? Why do you fucking care about any of this?" I yelled, throwing my hands in the air, frustrated. He just shrugged which made me want to rip him to shreds. At least that would be one leech down.

"Leah…" Edward started but I growled to cut him off.

"Don't say my name" I growled but he stayed unphased.

"Why are you so mad?" he asked, despite the fact that I so did not want to talk to him.

"I'm fucking mad because you're fucking annoying me. And you're not fucking leaving me alone! You act like you fucking know me better!" I ranted, walking towards him and pointing my finger at him. I stopped only 5 steps away from him but he still didn't change his state. I took in some breaths after expressing my anger.

"…sometimes I feel I do" He finally answered.

"What?" I sharply questioned.

"I feel I know you better…More than you at times" he continued. I couldn't believe this. This leech is actually saying that he knows me better than I know myself. That's it! This is his death wish, isn't it?

"I'm going to kill you and your pathetic Bella!" I roared, feeling myself shake.

"Why are you involving Bella?" He asked, almost a bit curious for some reason.

"Cause she's the reason I'm here and the reason you're here and walking dead!" I screamed.

"I'm trying to help you, Leah" Edward said and I stared at him. What the fuck is this leech talking about?

"Help me? HELP ME? I don't need your fucking help! I don't need anyone's help! Why are you fucking doing this?" I barked at him, so close that his leech stench was practically suffocating me.

"…Did you wonder why I kissed you?" he asked.

"Huh?" I exclaimed at him going totally off topic. What fucking kiss? That wasn't a kiss. It was an assault! A fucking assault!

"I kissed you to prove that you're not a monster" Edward stated, ignoring my bitch rant in my head, as he crossed his arms across his chest. Monster? MONSTER? Did he call me a monster?

"What the-that's right. I'm not the fucking monster, you are! All of you!" I yelled, shoving his shoulder with my finger. But he didn't budge.

"Go back to your pathetic, Bella. You just love annoying people don't you? Annoying and hurting Jacob and now you're fucking pushing my buttons too? Why? Why the fuck would you do this to us? I thought you were the 'good' guy. I guess leeches are just fucking annoying pieces of shit, and you're the top of that pyramid!" I snarled and then abruptly turned, and walked away. There, he got a piece of Leah Clearwater. That fucking bastard has being screwing me up and I just realized that he's doing it cause he's just a piece of worthless bored ass shit.

"I don't hate _you_…or _Jacob_" Edward announced. "I don't want to hurt _either_ of _you_"

"What the hell are you _saying_? You're just fucking screwing everything!" I yelled, over my shoulder, continuing to stalk away.

"…I don't want _another_ to suffer" He replied, knowing that I heard even as I walked off. What the fuck is that supposed to me?

"Then, FUCK OFF" I answered, with a growl and ran for it. Who the fuck does this leech think he is? He just comes into my life and just fucks it up?

I've already lost everything and now a fucking leech thinks he can control it? Why the fuck does he keep tampering with my life? WHY THE FUCK DOES HE GIVE A SHIT? Cause I certainly don't give a shit to any of this!

The rage that was rushing in my blood was because of this leech, the fact that he won't fuck off. Rage also at the fact that I felt a bit used by a leech and how that scene with Jacob, he almost made it look like it was meant for me. Like he was trying to _prove something_ by meddling with Jacob and my brain. THAT FUCK ASS!

But there was another part of the rage which I wasn't sure what caused it. It was first confusion before it turned to rage at the sight of the leech. Like I accused him not only for what he's done to me so far, but I felt like I was accusing him for something he had done to _something_ or _someone_.

At this moment, my senses were blinded with rage. I was blinded with anger and that's all that mattered. I hadn't felt this rage for awhile and it was time to embrace it again. My hard shell was strengthened more with the rage I felt for the leech, collaborating with everything that had fucked up my life.

And now I am ready to rip the shreds out of one of the reasons for _where_ and _who_ I am.

* * *

…**hmm, hi. I'm soo sorry. SORRY. SORRY. I know. I know, it's been forever. I've put you in hold for a while. But if you had checked my profile, you would have known that I had exams at that time and I had to concentrate on that. Exams got over in June but then I went through my whole lazy ass stage so I wasn't able to work on any projects.**

**Yeah, I suck ass. But now that I have a laptop, it's actually helping me to write more. So yay! I actually wrote ¼ of this chapter during exams but then I had MAJOR WRITER'S BLOCK AND LAZYASS NESS that I was unable to fully finish it, until now.**

**So…what do you think of this chapter? Wasn't expecting it huh? :P Like I told you, this story is a lot different from the other Leah/Edward stuff. This isn't exactly a romance fanfic. And I know you're wondering why is Jacob so much in this? That's cause…well, it goes with the plot and also when you think Eclipse, it has to do a bit with Jacob. I'll explain that all later. **

**The **_"italics"_** are the past conversation that Leah and Emily had, if you guys didn't figure it out. I kind of again lost it towards ¼ down. So I'm sorry, but I hope you're a bit aware of what I tried to say. The grammer is also not the best (didn't proofread it much) I know, I still suck :P**

**REVIEWS WOULD BE AWESOME. If you review, the next chapter would be out within a week =) PROMISE.**

**Hint:**** Look at **_**the italics**_**. They could really help you understand what I have in mind ;)**


	7. Chapter 7

**Looking at you through the glass**

God, I _hate_ bloodsuckers.

So you can imagine how much I am enjoying, ripping them into nothing this very moment. I feel so empowered by my anger that I don't care about anything else but stuff that would just fuel my anger even more.

Everything that has screwed my life was taken out on these leeches. Every single piece of them was a part of the hatred, the pain, the regret that I ever faced in my entire life.

Just losing to Dana in running in the fifth grade. _Rip_

Losing my grandma's bracelet in the park when I was thirteen. _Rip_

Falling for Sam Uley. _Rip Rip_

For ever trusting Emily Young. _Rip Rip_

For taking the life of my mom's husband. _Rip Rip_

For making my brother hate me right now. _Rip Rip_

For looking like a monster. _Rip Rip_

For even listening to Edward fucking Cullen. _Rip Rip_

But the last and the most painful and regretful point of my pathetic life;

For being who I am. _Rip Rip Rip Rip_

A complete bloodbath. A bloodbath for protection for the Cullens and the pack. A bloodbath for revenge for the red haired leech. A bloodbath for love for Bella, Ed-mind reader and for that clueless idio-I mean Jacob. But for me, this is a bloodbath of pure anger. I was fighting against everything. Anything that could or would destroy me.

I stomped on the remains of one red eyed leech that I had just taken care of. The crunching sound of the leech's skull turning into mulch underneath my paws, made me feel satisfied and fueled.

_Damn Clearwater, and I thought that I was on a roll_ I heard that jackass Paul say as he jumped over the crushed body that he had also helped demolish.

I snorted as a reply. I wasn't in the mood for his talk, not that I ever have been. I wasn't in the mood for anyone. My _'beloved'_ ex bastard Sam forced us into pairs to 'assist' the Cullens in this battle.

Part of his 'tactical effective plan that will ensure victory as well as the fact that we have to support our brothers –gives-a-pity-gaze-at-the-harpy- and sisters' speech. _Beautiful_ isn't it?

Right now, everyone was my _enemy_. Everyone was out to get me. I _worked alone_. Anyways, I did have to hold off the load when that stupid Jacob made a late entrance. And that idiot was gloating, like –you guessed it- an idiot. Why the hell is he beaming like the fricking sun? But then I saw it.

That fricking leech lover. And that mind reader let them do that? _Isn't he a mind reader?_ I will never understand this –if you call it- relationship. I don't even want to try.

Jacob was no different from the others. He's the most pathetic in the lot and sometimes I wonder why is he like that? I'll never understand that either.

I'm so lucky at the fact that I was able to master the ability to hide some of my thoughts. At least I can keep some of them a bit private. No one would know what I'm thinking unless they actually listen to me, which of course, I know will never happen.

I let out a sigh as I gazed at the Cullens start lighting the torn up leeches. Well, that felt quick. I guess I was so caught up with my thoughts and my anger that time just whizzed by.

And suddenly, I felt a small pierce on my hind leg. And then I saw the sight of the sidekick to the red head leech twisting my baby brother's hind legs. It wasn't soo much of physical pain than emotional and mental pain.

_Seth!_ I yelled in my head as I watched the leech dive for my brother again but luckily Seth was quick enough to move away and get a hold of its shoulder, biting into it.

_He's fine, Leah. Edward is there_ Sam said as he kicked more ripped pieces of the leeches into the fire. How could you he say that? How could he be so heartless? This is my baby brother we are talking about!

_What? We're just gonna ignore this? What happened to 'protecting our brothers', ass much?_ I snarled at the black wolf. He sighed and slowly turned to face me.

_There is nothing we can do. He can handle it. Relax, Leah _Sam merely trotted away along with the rest of the pack. Relax? He's telling me to relax? I stood my ground, trying to keep my anger intact as I felt their thoughts turn into murmurs.

Sam _promised_ me. He promised me that Seth would be safe, then what is this? He promised me that he will stop hurting me, then what is this?

I'm the idiot. I'm the idiot to actually think that Sam's promises meant anything. That jerk. That bastard. That cheat. That asshole.

From the corner of my thoughts, I saw Seth shake his weak hind leg after ripping the leech but I was too agitated to bask in glory at the fact that my brother was okay.

Like I said before, I can't trust anyone. Everyone is out to get me. There are all my enemies. Not just these leeches, but the Cullens, the pack, Bella and even fucking Edward. I felt my wolf body shake a bit, with uncontrollable anger.

They think that I'm weak, they think that I'm not strong enough, they think that I need them, they think I'm pathetic that I need their pity? Well, screw them. Everyone is my enemy and anger is my only ally. It has been for a while now and I've lived with it.

While I watching my damn pack and Cullens slowly retreat away from the clearing since apparently the red haired leech was carved up real nice, was when I caught the scent.

_Bloodsucker._ Not Cullen but a red eyed one. I whipped my head around and caught the glance of a leech running behind a bunch of boulders. A snarl escaped my mouth as I stalked to towards the boulders, baring teeth. This is just what I need, to rip another leech, to kill my mortal enemy, to vent my anger on.

_Leah? Where the hell are you going to?_ I heard the idiot ask me but as usual, I ignored him. When I heard the leech's footsteps increase pace, I made a dash and grabbed the leech's shoulder with my teeth and threw the leech about 15 feet away but it landed on its feet, in crouched position and baring teeth as well.

_Leah! What the fuck do you think you're doing?_ I heard him gasp again but I brushed him away and growled at the leech which he also returned. That leech was…horrifying looking. His clothes were tattered and his brown locks were in a mess as it covered its crimson eyes. He almost looked like that fucking mind reader. Now that is _just_ great.

I made a dive for the leech at the same time he did, but he somehow was able to slid under me and get hold of my right hind leg and kind of twist it.

_AHHH! Fuck, that hurts_ I growled and tried to wiggle him away but he didn't move so I brought my jaw down on his shoulder and bite right through it. You pinch me, I'll pinch you back, bitch.

_Damn it LEAH!_ Jacob growled again and I could see him running towards me. Fuck him, why the hell does he have to care now? I'm not doing to admit defeat and let this idiot help me! I bit even harder into the leech which made him shout out and slowly loosen his grip on my leg. Shaking my leg, I moved my jaw from his shoulder up to his collarbone and pierced into it, throwing him forward. HA! In your face.

_I don't need your help, Black!_ I snarled as the leech slowly started to get up. I smirked with confidence that I am able to take a leech full on. Before I could get my hold back on the leech, the leech was nowhere in sight.

_What the fuck?_ I cursed and started to look around for it. I slowly stalked around the boulders and the mini rock cliff, trying to keep my guard. I should have ripped it when I had the chance! _That fucking leech_. I growled at myself and out of frustration at how stupid Jacob had to mess with my concentration. Everyone is always trying to make me lose. No one will ever understand what I need and what I am. Then my wolf ears picked up something. It sounded like someone's feet thrashing against small pebbles. And that's when I realized. I turned around so quickly, just to see the same leech launch itself off the rock cliff and diving down towards me.

This was the moment where all my anger had been flushed out of my system and I was vulnerable. I was just as vulnerable as I was before. Before when Sam left me, the same time my dad died, the same when Seth refused to even glance at me, and just as vulnerable now. I couldn't get my senses right. At that moment, everything flashed before me. It was as if I had already given in, because I was too vulnerable to fight. I couldn't escape. I could never escape. Escape from Sam, escape from all of this, just an _escape_.

_NOOOOOOOOO!_ I heard someone growl as my eyes closed, ready to feel the leech crush my body. But something happened. Instead of feeling blinding pain on my body, I felt a strong force shove my tiny wolf body all the way across the clearing and collide hard against a giant tree.

_LEAAAAH!_ I heard Seth's thoughts cry out for me as panic coursed through him. I was able to only focus on his voice when I felt a huge rush of pain spread through my limbs as my body landed flat down on the ground, peeling of the trunk of the tree. I let out a couple of small whimpers, trying to clear my head of the heat and trying to regain my sight.

_NO!_ I heard another voice that wasn't any of the pack members. Edward? What—it was through Seth's thoughts that I could hear him and vaguely see him through Seth's eyes. I tried to move a bit but I collapsed down again. What's happening?

_Sam—help him—_ I heard Edward gasp again. Sam? And that I realized; what the hell am I doing here? I was with the leech a minute ago…the leech had me. I was about to be killed by the leech…then what happened? I heard a couple of snarls and growls. Putting all my will power, I turned my body to face what everyone else was gazing at. I blinked a couple of times, trying to restore my vision but all I could see was blur, because of the collision and also of the water collected in my eyes.

Shaking my head out of the snarls, growls and orders been screamed in my head, I saw a lot of movement in front of me. I saw a black and dark gray blur, wrestling something before they dashed off with something dangling between them. My gaze moved all around the field, as I watched more blurs move around the clearing. My gaze fixated on a russet blur that was on the ground. I knew it was someone but my eyes couldn't focus. I slowly closed my eyes and heard an alarming cry of pain before my eyes slowly opened and focused.

Two tears that were covering my corneas fell when I opened my eyes and saw it, on the ground. It was on its back as small whimpers escaped from its mouth and then slowly its body started to shrink. Shrink till it became _him_. His arms were wrapped around his crushed torso and his jaw was clenched, eyes were closed as blood started to trail down, from his forehead down his aggrieved face.

I was drained. I choked out a small gasp, gazing at his head slowly rock to the side, his eyes flickering at me before a small breath escaped from his lips, and his eyelids slowly fell down over his eyes. Anger was no longer fueling my system. My body was tingling with guilt and most of all, shock. How…how did this happen? How could this happen? Why would _he_ do that?

Did I want this to happen…? No, of course not. I don't think I ever wanted it to come to this. Then how did it? And why him? Why do feel even more hurt, even guiltier that it's Jacob?

"_I don't hate you…or Jacob...I don't want to hurt either of you" _I heard Edward's previous words rush in my head. What did he mean by that? Did _I_ want to hurt Jacob? Did I _actually _hate Jacob?

"…_I don't want another to suffer" _rang in my head. Another…to suffer. _Oh my god_, recognition slowly started to ascend. How is this possible? What was I saying? Jacob wasn't like the others at all. He's different from the others. He's not pathetic…like I said before. He's in love and…he's fighting a losing battle.

Just like…_I_ did.

How…how is it possible? How could I have not seen this? This can't be true. Jacob…he's, he's not like me…he's nothing like…but then again, that talk that Edward and Jacob had…was uncanny. It was almost exact to me and Emily.

Edward was _Emily_…and Bella was another _Sam_.

Jacob wasn't out to get me. He was…_me_. He was me…that I had to see through my eyes.

"_I kissed you to prove that you're not a monster"_ Another line that Edward said, raced in my head. A monster…_that was it_. That was what I had become. I _was_ a monster, in fact. I was soo fueled by anger that I couldn't tell what was plainly playing in front of me. See, as my past almost repeated itself in someone else's life.

He loved, so did I.

He lost, so did I.

He's hurting, so am I.

He's falling, I already did.

We both were _different_ trains but our stations were the _same_.

No one understood what I went through and that angered me, but I never wished this on anyone. I didn't want to turn into the one thing that I feared the most; _the monster I had physically become_.

The bloodsuckers weren't the enemy, the pack or Jacob weren't the enemy, Edward and the Cullens weren't the enemy. I was my _own_ enemy.

As I gazed at Jacob's unconscious, laying on the dead grass and heard the Cullens and pack rush to his aid, I laid frozen on the ground, staring at the _mirror_ in front of me.

_What have I done? _

**

* * *

**

HI. Sorry for the delay. Like I said, I had vacation and I came back late. I wrote ¾ of this chapter on my ITOUCH cause I couldn't carry my laptop so be PROUD OF ME -.- And then I wrote the rest a few days ago but couldn't post it cause school started and IT'S CRAAAP. But here it is.

**Btw, my mini description for this story is edited a bit so that it isn't 'misleading' that most people apparently did. So yeah. **

"_**We both were different trains but our stations were the same" **_**– I love this quote =L I CAME UP WITH IT XDD Smart, ne? I'm such a self-proud person (if that's a word)**

**Soo…OOOOHHHH *snickers* I know a lot of you didn't want this scene to be written cause it 'apparently makes Leah the bad person' but I do think this is one of the climax's that Leah has and plus, I liked this scene (this is how I imagined the fight scene by the way. Much more intense and almost had a reddish tint to it). Confused as to why the fuck is Jacob here? -.- well, it's natural that if I have to tell Leah's story, I have to tell Jacob's too x) **

**REVIEW, REVIEW. And if you're still confused, you could leave questions and I shall hopefully answer them on the next chapter when everything comes clearer.**

**Last chapter shall be out in a while so LOOK OUT XDD **


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